


It Must Be Some Kind of Magic

by echoicdreamscape



Category: Saving Hope
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-01
Updated: 2017-08-12
Packaged: 2018-11-22 01:47:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 18
Words: 31,187
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11370021
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/echoicdreamscape/pseuds/echoicdreamscape
Summary: Harry Potter AU. Maggie and Sydney meet in their fifth year at Hogwarts as Potions partners. A boyfriend, fear, and studies get in the way of their potential relationship, but they can't help but be drawn to each other.





	1. Chapter 1

Maggie’s cloak flaps in the wind as she sprints to the dungeon. “Damn it, damn it, damn it,” she repeats to herself as she dodges the opposing traffic of students. Why did she have to choose the first day of her fifth year to try out a new parchment cut healing spell? Why did she think she could pull it off when it was a N.E.W.T. level spell?

She rounds the corner to Potions just as the clock strikes nine. Thank goodness. Maggie lets out a grateful breath before realizing there’s only one free seat-in the front and center of the classroom. The other seat at the table is occupied by some redheaded girl Maggie’s never seen before.

After speed-walking down the aisle and trying not to hit anyone with her bag (and mostly succeeding), Maggie plops herself down on the bench and tries to calm her flushed cheeks. The girl sitting next to her doesn’t so much as glance at her, keeping her eyes trained on Professor Snape as he enters the room. Maggie can’t decide whether that’s a good thing.

“Welcome to fifth year Potions,” Snape drawls. “You will be brewing a Strengthening Solution over the next three days. Turn to page sixty-seven.” He gives them all a scowl and turns around with a flourish of his cape.

Maggie notices a movement in the corner of her eye. Her partner has already pulled out her wand and has lit her cauldron silently, putting her wand away again before Maggie even sees it. Maggie raises her eyebrows, impressed, until she notices the girl’s green tie and the badge she wears proudly on her chest. 

_Well shit._ Of course she has to be partnered with a Slytherin Prefect in Potions class.

“Hey,” Maggie tries to address the girl.

The girl continues to add salamander blood into her cauldron, hyper focused on the liquid inside. Steam begins to rise and she nods approvingly.

“Hey,” Maggie says a little louder.

The girl doesn’t notice as she stirs her potion.

Maggie taps her on the arm.

The girl starts with a small jump and turns to look at her with an irked expression.

“I uh wanted to introduce myself since we’ll be sharing the desk for the semester. I’m Maggie.” Maggie holds out her hand.

The other girl glances down at Maggie’s hand and back up to her face appraisingly. She slowly brings her right hand up and shakes Maggie’s firmly.

“Sydney.” And with that, she turns back to her potion.

Maggie shakes her head in disbelief as she lights a fire under her cauldron and pulls out her potions kit. She’s going to have to vent to Alex after class. 

Maggie’s happy with her yellow concoction at the end of class. Well, she was happy until she peeked at Sydney’s and saw the exact shade of lime green described in the textbook in the redhead’s cauldron. 

“Wow.”

She meant to say it more quietly, but Sydney has heard her. Sydney makes quick eye contact with her and gathers her books.

“I’ll see you tomorrow,” she says stiffly, then turns and leaves.

Maggie’s left sitting at the table wondering if the other girl hates her or something. Maybe it’s just a Slytherin thing?

* * *

“-and then she just said ‘see you tomorrow’ in the driest tone ever! What did I do?” Maggie throws her hands up. Alex has a hand on her chin and stares thoughtfully into the distance.

“Slytherin Prefect, you say? Must be Sydney Katz.” 

“Yeah, her name was Sydney. I didn’t mention that?” Maggie reaches out to grab a roll. 

“Nope. I’ve heard she’s pretty cold.” Alex stirs her fork, mashing her potatoes. She looks up then points her fork at Maggie. “Your tie is loose, by the way.”

Maggie looks down. “Ugh, maybe that’s why she looked at me like that.” She tightens her yellow tie.

“Speak of the devil,” Alex says quietly. The two watch Sydney sit at the edge of the Slytherin table by herself. She pulls out a large book and starts reading after reaching for an apple.

Maggie sighs. “I kind of feel bad for her, though. It doesn’t look like she has any friends.” 

Alex smiles. “You have such a big heart, Mags.”

Maggie rolls her eyes in response. “Don’t start.”

* * *

Maggie arrives early the next day, not wanting to repeat what had happened the first day. Sydney is, of course, already sitting at their table and reading. 

“Good morning,” Maggie greets hesitantly. 

“Morning,” Sydney replies, not looking up from her book.

 _Well, that’s a little better,_ Maggie supposes. 

That day’s Potions class breezes by, but not in a good way. Maggie ends up dripping with sweat after being engulfed in steam after she had added half a griffin claw instead of pounding it into a powder form. Her potion somehow ends up orange at the end of the day, while Sydney’s is, of course, impeccable. 

Sydney packs up her books immediately after the bell rings, then looks over at Maggie's cauldron. “You should read the instructions more slowly,” she says impassively before leaving.

Maggie just looks back at where Sydney was standing. Was that Sydney’s way of being helpful? Or was she just being a bitch? Maggie can’t read her at all.

* * *

“Zach!” Maggie grabs her friend’s arm as he’s headed to the bathroom after his class.

“Whoa, Mags, what’s wrong?” Zach looks worried, but uncomfortable because he really needs to pee. “Actually, can you tell me after I use the bathroom?”

“Oh, yeah, go!” Maggie pushes him in…and waits outside the men’s bathroom like some sort of creeper. She fidgets with her hands and looks down at the ground so she doesn’t have to make eye contact with anyone.

Zach comes out quickly; thank goodness men can relieve themselves so quickly. He wipes his hands on his cloak and gestures for Maggie to follow him.

“Let’s get some lunch,” he suggests.

They load their plates in the Great Hall. Maggie gawks at Zach’s; he’s piled it high with chicken and bread, nothing else. 

Zach notices her stare. “I’m a growing man, Mags,” he says through a mouthful of chicken.

“Not quite a man…” Maggie makes a face and takes a bite of her fish.

“So what did you want to talk about?” Zach swallows and gulps down half a glass of pumpkin juice.

“Tell me everything you know about Sydney Katz,” she says hurriedly.

“Sydney Katz, huh,” Zach makes an unreadable expression. “Well, she just transferred in this year.”

“But she’s a Prefect!” Maggie can’t comprehend how a transfer student can receive such an honor.

“Oh yeah, she was some sort of prodigy at her old school. Apparently she was a Prefect there, too. I heard a rumor that she was at a N.E.W.T. level there, but Hogwarts pushed her back to a fifth-year level.” Zach piles more chicken onto his plate.

“Maybe that’s why she’s so mean,” Maggie ponders.

“I wouldn’t know, Mags. She always stays in her dorm when she’s not on Prefect duty. She’s probably the most private person in our house.” Zach grabs an éclair and shoves half of it in his mouth. “Kinda cute, though,” he concludes.

Maggie mouths a “what?!” and taps the table with her fingers. “She’s my Potions partner and I don’t know if I should talk to her or leave her alone. And I think she hates me?”

Zach considers this. “No, she doesn’t hate you. She’s just slow to warm up. Give her time.”

Maggie smiles. “Thanks, Zach.”

He smiles back then shoves the rest of the éclair into his mouth.

* * *

The third day of Potions finds Maggie scrambling to find a solution in her textbook to the thick mess of a potion she’s made. It’s at least back to yellow, but now it’s so thick she can barely stir it.

“I could really use some Strengthening Solution right now,” she mutters under her breath as she exerts all her upper body strength, trying to stir her potion. 

She doesn’t see the corner of Sydney’s mouth quirk up. The redhead stops stirring her own perfectly turquoise potion to look over at Maggie’s.

“Add some mermaid tears,” she suggests.

Maggie makes eye contact with her for the second time since they’ve met. 

“Thanks.”

Sydney’s advice ends up saving her potion. It ends up sky blue, which Snape deems passable as he looks into her cauldron. He turns to Sydney’s and gives an approving nod. 

“Commendable,” he comments.

A hush falls over the room. Snape has never given such praise before. A “commendable” from him is like a “perfect” from any other professor.

Sydney stands up a little straighter and nods. “Thank you, Professor.”

Maggie turns to Sydney after the bell rings.

“Thanks for the tip; you saved me today.” She bites her lip and hesitantly smiles.

Sydney holds her books to her chest. “Of course. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

Maggie smiles as she packs her bag. It turns out Sydney doesn’t hate her, after all.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I noticed I haven't been adding songs lately, not like many of you probably care anyway. I think most of the chapters in this fic won't be inspired by any specific songs. I've uncharacteristically been listening to a lot of love songs lately, so that may influence some details. We'll see!

Sydney Katz lies on her bed, letting random thoughts cross her mind before she goes to sleep. There is a girl snoring to the right of her and the one to her left has a candle flickering as she scribbles a last-minute essay as quickly as she can. Between the scratching on parchment and the snoring Sydney knows she’s not going to fall asleep anytime soon.

She didn’t have this problem at her old school. Before she transferred, she was a fourth-year student about to take N.E.W.T.-level Potions and Herbology at the start of the next term. She was always precocious and was on track to become a Healer in record time. But her parents wanted her to attend a school that had more alumni who became Healers, so they made her transfer to Hogwarts. Hogwarts had a strict policy of attending classes within your cohort, so Sydney was pushed back to O.W.L.-level classes, meaning she essentially had to repeat two years’ worth of Potions and Herbology she had long since mastered. Sydney had fought with her parents for months about it, but they didn’t give her a choice. They managed to convince the Headmaster to make her a Prefect to make her feel better since she was a Prefect at her old school, but she still felt furious even as she walked into the castle on her first day.

She sat down alone at the Slytherin table that day, not bothering to speak to anyone. Friends weren’t something Sydney made easily. She had many acquaintances at her old school and got along with her dormmates, but she didn’t consider anyone a friend. Sydney was the type of person who prioritized her academics and future career over anything else. She didn’t have time for distractions. She didn’t really feel lonely, but she sometimes envied the fun others would have together. 

Sydney’s been at Hogwarts for a month and she thinks she might want a friend after all. She feels hollow inside when she sees her peers levitating notes to each other during class, eating together in the Great Hall, and going to Hogsmeade together. She’s excelling at her courses, of course, and she thinks she has the time and energy to get to know some people.

There’s a girl who crosses her mind almost nightly. Sydney shifts positions and turns her pillow over as she thinks of her. Maggie Lin is her Potions partner this year, although partner may be a bit of a stretch. They share a table together, and the extent of their collaboration is Sydney helping her when she makes a mistake. She hates to see things done incorrectly and feels obligated to give the other girl tips.

Sydney has been covered by steam from Maggie’s cauldron a few times, but Maggie’s a hard worker who tries her best to fix her mistakes, as frantic as she can become. Sydney remembers the time Maggie’s cauldron had emitted purple steam that spread to the tables adjacent to theirs as well as the table behind them. Everything the steam touched became purple, and could only be removed by a potion Professor Snape quickly stirred together and sprayed on all of them.

Sydney remembers the frustration she felt at first until she looked at Maggie. The other girl was on the verge of tears and looked as mortified as anyone could get. Sydney put her feelings aside and touched Maggie on the elbow, telling her that it was a simple mistake that had a simple solution. Anyone could have made that error, and it wasn’t even a serious one; she pointed out a classmate in the back who had melted his cauldron as an example. Sydney wasn’t used to consoling people, but she seemed to have done a good job. Maggie blinked, swallowed, and smiled at her. She murmured a quick “thanks” before she hurried out of the classroom that day, beating even Sydney out. 

Sydney figures that if she wanted to have a friend, it would be Maggie. She has a very interesting sense of humor, and Sydney secretly likes to hear what she mutters under her breath during Potions. 

The girl next to her finally finishes her essay and blows out the candle. Sydney finally lies in darkness, although the other girl is still snoring away. Sydney sighs as she sits up, grasping for her wand that sits on her bedside table. She casts a quick Silencing Charm she’ll have to remember to remove tomorrow morning and falls back onto her bed. The night is at last cool, dark, and silent. 

Yes, tomorrow Sydney will try to talk to Maggie before Potions starts instead of reading. She thinks Maggie will be receptive since she tried to talk to her that first day…

Sydney falls asleep trying to repress thoughts about how cute Maggie is, too.


	3. Chapter 3

Sydney’s sitting at the Slytherin table eating lunch with _Advanced Potion-Making_ propped up against a fruit basket. She’s in her usual spot alone at the end of the table. The page depicting Draught of Living Death ripples slightly when someone takes a seat across from her. She narrows her eyes for a second then continues reading. She’s fine as long as this person doesn’t talk to her.

“Hey, Sydney.” 

Sydney looks up quickly, recognizing the voice. Maggie’s sitting across from her, chin propped on her elbow with an expectant smile.

“Can I sit with you?” Maggie looks hopeful. Sydney sees Maggie’s friends sitting at the Gryffindor table. The long-haired Gryffindor girl and the tall guy from her house are sneaking covert glances at them.

“You don’t want to sit with your friends?” Sydney sounds hesitant.

“Well, you always sit alone, so I thought you’d might like some company. I can go if you want to read, though.” Maggie half stands before Sydney speaks up.

“No, that’s fine.” Sydney closes her book and puts her elbows on the table, leaning forward. “How are you?”

“I’m really excited for the Quidditch match on Saturday! I can’t wait!” Maggie smiles broadly and looks so excited-and cute-. No, Sydney mentally chastises herself. She just looks excited.

Sydney wrinkles her nose. “Quidditch, huh.”

Maggie grins. “Not a fan?” She grabs a few grapes and pops one into her mouth.

“I’m not a fan of sports in general.” Sydney shrugs. “Who’s playing?”

“Aha!” Maggie perks up. “Hufflepuff vs. Slytherin!” 

Sydney exhales with amusement. “I see.”

“You should-uh-come with me!” Maggie looks a little anxious but still hopeful as she twirls a strand of hair around a finger.

Sydney considers this. Maggie’s inviting her to do something with her! It could be the beginning of that friendship she was looking for!

“Sure.”

* * *

Saturday rolls around all too quickly. Sydney read about the rules of Quidditch on Friday, but can’t fathom who she’s supposed to be focusing her attention on. From what she’s read, there are too many balls flying around, and is she supposed to watch the Chasers or the Seekers? How can anyone justify the Snitch being worth a hundred and fifty points? She hopes Maggie will have the answers to these questions. She also hopes that Maggie won’t mind if she cheers for Slytherin. As a Prefect, she has to maintain a certain appearance.

Sydney wraps a Slytherin scarf around her neck before heading out. She and Maggie have planned to meet by the greenhouses, one of her favorite places on campus. Sydney breathes in the cool Autumn breeze as she walks outside. Maggie is standing half-concealed by a tree and Sydney feels slight nerves and tries to shake them off. She spots something black a foot tall on Maggie’s head before she sees the rest of her.

Sydney tilts her head in confusion as she approaches the other girl. “What’s that?” she asks with apprehension.

Maggie turns around and smiles when she sees her. Sydney definitely doesn’t feel butterflies in her stomach.

“It’s a badger! Go Hufflepuff!” Maggie wears the hat proudly. “No snake for you?” she adds teasingly.

Sydney frowns as she tugs on her scarf. “I think this will suffice.”

Maggie gives her a “ha!” and they walk to the pitch together, talking about Potions since that’s all they have in common so far. Maggie tries to convince her that her Volubulis Potion was almost as good as Sydney’s own.

“I mean, it wasn’t as sparky as yours, but it worked great!”

“I couldn’t speak until five seconds after you administered it to me!” Sydney exclaims. She doesn’t mention that her potion worked on Maggie almost immediately.

“I’ll catch up to you, you’ll see.” Maggie looks so confident that Sydney can’t help but smile. 

“Yes, we’ll see.”

“How’d you get so good at Potions, anyway?” Maggie asks.

Sydney’s face falls and Maggie notices.

“Oh, touchy subject? We don’t have to-“ Sydney cuts her off by raising a hand.

“No, it’s okay. I was supposed to be in a N.E.W.T.-level Potions class if I had stayed at my old school. I’ve brewed most of those potions before. That’s why I’m so good at them.” Sydney twists her mouth, still unhappy.

“I’m sorry, Sydney.” Maggie has the ability to look genuinely empathetic, which Sydney appreciates. She can’t help but notice how expressive Maggie’s eyes are as well.

“Nothing I can do about it now. I’ll just continue showing you up,” Sydney jokes as she elbows Maggie gently.

Maggie’s pleasantly surprised at the gesture. She’s glad the other girl is opening up to her.

“So it’s only because you’ve brewed them before? No natural talent in you?” Maggie elbows Sydney back.

Sydney breaks into a smile. “Oh, I never said that. You should see what I can do with a Polyjuice Potion! I’ve gotten it to a point that it almost doesn’t taste bad.”

“Well, you’ve sold me! Sign me up! Now I can fulfill my wildest dreams of turning into someone else with only a _slight_ bad taste in my mouth!” 

Maggie enjoys the way Sydney laughs out loud. She really has a beautiful laugh.

They continue their banter as they arrive at the stands ten minutes before the game begins. 

“So…where do you want to watch? The Hufflepuff or the Slytherin stands?” Maggie realizes now that this may be a bit of an issue.

Sydney shrugs. “Yours will probably be better. My group isn’t very friendly to people not in our House.”

Maggie nods. “You’re pretty nice, though, for a Slytherin.” She finishes the sentence with a little upward tilt to her mouth.

Sydney lets out a chuckle but doesn’t respond. Well, she doesn’t know how to respond. She knows a little about the history of her House and has definitely seen people stereotype her just because of the tie she wears. Before she can continue thinking about it, Maggie grabs her hand and leads her to the Hufflepuff stands. Sydney’s eyes widen as she feels Maggie’s warm hand around hers. She feels a heat rise to her cheeks as she lets herself be pulled forward.

Maggie releases her hand as soon as they’re standing in two open spots. Sydney feels the lack of touch immediately and finds herself missing it. 

“You ready to lose?” Maggie looks competitive, but it still smiling.

“I should be asking you that,” Sydney replies with a finger stroking her chin. “Slytherin has an eighty-seven percent winning statistic.”

Maggie looks impressed. “Did you do _research_ before coming here?”

Sydney feels heat rise to her cheeks again and looks embarrassed.

Maggie touches her on the arm. “What a nerd,” she teases harmlessly.

Sydney rolls her eyes but can’t help but smile. Maggie just has this way about her that makes her act more open than usual.

* * *

Maggie spends nearly the entire match cheering on the Hufflepuff team and yelling at the Slytherins. Her voice is hoarse by the end and she had to take off her hat because the people behind her couldn’t see, but she had a great time. 

Sydney spends the entire match listening to what Maggie yells out. She’s very creative with her insults, calling the Slytherin Keeper “as uncoordinated as a one-legged spider” at one point. Sydney may be a Slytherin, but she had to laugh at that one. 

The two bump shoulders as they walk back to the castle.

“I had a great time, Maggie. Thanks for inviting me.”

“So sports aren’t so bad, huh?” Maggie points just one finger gun at her.

“Not with the right company,” Sydney replies with a look in her eye.

Maggie feels the corners of her mouth pulling up but she doesn’t know why.

They walk the rest of the way in a companionable silence. Sydney points to the dungeons. “I’m heading back to my Common Room. I have to change before doing rounds.”

“Ah yes, fancy Prefect. Going to polish your badge to scare the first years?” Maggie laughs at her own joke as Sydney rolls her eyes at her.

“Not quite.” Sydney pauses and her eyes flicker to Maggie’s lips before looking her in the eyes again. She really hopes Maggie didn’t notice. “I’ll see you later.”

“Yeah.”

Maggie takes a hesitant step forward before holding her arms out for a hug. Sydney meets her halfway and awkwardly pats her on the back once before withdrawing. They smile swiftly at each other before parting ways.

Each of them walks back to their dorm with their heartbeat pounding loudly in their ears.


	4. Chapter 4

Maggie thinks she has a crush. Well, she’s not sure. She’s knows that her heart rate increases, she smiles more easily, and she stumbles over her words when she’s around Sydney. Maggie’s never really had a crush before, not like this. She’s turned giggly around cute boys before, and she’s never been afraid to act on her feelings. She hasn’t done anything with anyone in a while at this point, and especially hasn’t dated since she broke up with Gavin. Maggie blames this as the reason why she can’t figure out how she feels about Sydney.

On one hand, she loves spending time with her. Sydney’s really opened up to her; they spend Potions together talking and trading tips (which is mostly Sydney helping her if something goes wrong), Sydney’s joined her lunch table with Alex and Zach, they joined Potions Club together and quit together after they realized it was more remedial than exploratory, and they visit the greenhouses on the weekends to check on the plants. 

On the other hand, Maggie has never considered girls before. She’s not opposed to the idea; she’s just never thought about it for herself. Girls are so different from boys. The boys she’s been with have been so easy to read; they’re upfront with their intentions, and Maggie likes having fun with them. Girls, especially Sydney, are more reserved in general. Maggie knows girls don’t always say what they mean and they hide what they want to save themselves from embarrassment. Because of this, even if Sydney felt the same way about her, she probably wouldn’t show it.

Maggie supposes she can find Sydney attractive. She’s such an intense person that her personality eclipses everything else in many others’ eyes. Sydney is incredibly intelligent, assertive, and no-nonsense when it comes to most things. Maggie knows that these traits can put people off, but she likes them. Sydney is just unapologetically herself, not caring what others think of her. But what Maggie’s unsure about are the physical aspects. She supposes Sydney’s cute? She remembers that Zach said the same thing. The other girl is shorter than her, so anything physical (Maggie doesn’t let herself think too far) would be backwards from all of Maggie’s previous experiences. Girls are softer and less hairy, so that’s always a good thing. Overall, Sydney is meticulous about taking care of herself, spiritually, mentally, and physically. Maggie can get down with that.

But is Sydney into girls? Is she into anyone? Even if the answer is yes, is she willing to take the time away from her studies to date? Is Maggie her type? These questions race through Maggie’s head. 

The most pressing concern is that Maggie doesn’t want to risk their blossoming friendship to take a chance for something that may break them apart. She would much rather stay friends and hide her crush(?) than risk Sydney being scared off if she told her about her possible feelings.

Yes, Maggie figures the best thing to do is wait it out and see how she feels in the coming weeks. Maybe she’ll ask Sydney about her dating history to sneakily gauge who she’s into.

* * *

Maggie and Sydney are in the Owlery on a chilly Friday afternoon before dinner. Maggie ties a letter to her mom on a brown owl as the wind blows her hair into her eyes. “I won’t be too upset if you lose this,” she tells the owl conspiratorially, shaking her head so she can see. Sydney is pretending not to listen and holds in her smile as she ties a letter written to her parents and sister on her grey owl’s leg. She pats her owl on the head before it takes off.

“Ready to head out?” Sydney asks as she stands up. Maggie reaches out a hand to stabilize her. Sydney takes it and steadies herself, then holds on a fraction of a second too long before letting go. 

“Yup!” Maggie’s eyes flicker to their once-joined hands as she feels hers tingle. Signs are pointing for her in the direction of indeed having a crush on Sydney. Well, shit.

“Let’s stop by the greenhouses so we can check on the umbrella flowers,” Maggie suggests. She fights the urge to run away to figure out her feelings.

“Sounds like a plan.”

* * *

“What’s your favorite kind of flower?” Maggie asks out of the blue.

Sydney turns her head to stare at the other girl as they walk down the steps from the Owlery. Whoever designed the tower has some explaining to do. Who needs to climb over thirty steps (yes, she’s counted) just so they can send a letter? It doesn’t make any sense.

Maggie looks right back at her expectantly.

Sydney looks straight ahead and thinks about it. “Probably lilies. They’re elegant but simple.”

Maggie nods. She should have expected that. 

“What’s yours?”

The answer comes quickly and easily. “Sunflowers! They’re always smiling!”

Sydney smiles softly. “They fit you perfectly.”

Maggie blushes, glad that they’re both looking forward instead of at each other.

“My parents have a garden back home filled with fruit trees and roses and stuff. Maybe I could convince them to put in some sunflowers during the summer,” Sydney says thoughtfully.

Maggie sighs dreamily. “You’ll have to send me a picture! My mom would kill me if I started growing random things in her pristine garden.” The two finally reach the bottom of the steps.

“Send a picture, huh…now I miss my phone,” Sydney replies.

“Tell me about it! I hate having to catch up on all my shows and general news every holiday!” Maggie runs her hands through her hair.

Maggie’s a half-blood, so she luckily got to grow up simultaneously in both Muggle and magical cultures. She loves being connected to both worlds, even if Muggles are completely oblivious to magic (and honestly would be terrified of it) and some magical people look down on those who aren’t. Sydney had told her a few weeks ago that she was a Muggle-born, which impressed Maggie greatly. Sydney is a natural at all things magical, picking up the nuances of spells and potions as if they were second nature. Maggie remembers asking her how she was sorted into Slytherin as a Muggle-born.

“Oh, they sent me to the Headmaster’s office by Floo powder a few weeks before the term started and put the most unusual hat on my head,” Sydney had informed her. “It told me it was trying to decide between Ravenclaw and Slytherin for the longest time. It was so awkward! I was just sitting there with this huge talking hat on my head as the Headmaster just looked at me. But it yelled out Slytherin, so here I am now.”

“You’re still the nicest Slytherin I know,” Maggie had grinned cheekily at her.

“What are you thinking about? Kinda silent there, Lin.” Sydney interrupts her thoughts.

Maggie blinks. “Ah, nothing. Just thinking about Houses and such.”

“I still don’t understand why this school feels the need to pit us against one another and sort us by certain attributes. I mean I know the history behind this school, but why can’t we just be sorted by a metric more useful, such as grades?” Maggie’s learned quickly that Sydney likes to discuss a variety of things, and can usually use her logic to back things up.

“Oh, I don’t know. I kind of like it, though! The competition adds some flavor to this school! It’s exciting!” They’ve finally reached the greenhouses, and make their way to Greenhouse 3.

“Such abstract sorting criteria allow for prejudice, though. That’s something we don’t need more of in this world.” 

“That’s a good point, Syd. I never really thought of that,” Maggie concedes.

Sydney feels a thrill as she hears Maggie call her Syd. Maggie’s become her first friend, and they’ve gotten close pretty quickly. She supposes her enjoyment of the nickname is an indicator of their intimacy. Why she has to put it in such technical terms, she doesn’t really know.

Speaking of intimacy, though…Sydney’s been confused about Maggie lately. She’s greatly enjoying their friendship, but she’s had these thoughts lately that are becoming harder and harder to push aside. She catches herself admiring Maggie, not just for her personality, but also for her looks. But those thoughts aren’t the most worrying things. Sydney is terrified of admitting it to herself, but she thinks she might be…different. As her peers are engaging in dating and romance and all that, she’s slowly realizing that she’s not like them. She doesn’t think boys are especially cute, and she’s disgusted by the thought of touching one. Girls on the other hand, and especially Maggie…

But Sydney doesn’t have time to think about these things right now. Not when Maggie’s holding the door open to Greenhouse 3, waiting for her to walk in first. Not when the very person she might want to do _something_ with (she’s not sure yet) is right in front of her.

* * *

Maggie enters the greenhouse after Sydney, breathing in the humid air. The scent of dirt and plants greets her like an old friend. Sydney is walking a bit slower than usual, so Maggie slows her normal pace to follow her to the umbrella flowers. 

“Wow, they’re growing so well!” Maggie exclaims as she looks upward. The flowers are blooming in vibrant shades of yellow, orange, and red. She reaches up to stroke a petal. “They’re like a sunset.” She sighs happily and withdraws her hand, staring upward.

She misses the way Sydney looks at her while she’s admiring the flowers.

“What do you think, Syd?” Maggie looks at Sydney, who’s suddenly looking really nervous about something. 

“Oh-yes-very nice,” Sydney replies, distracted. She takes two steps toward Maggie then takes a step back but holds her weight on her front foot.

“Everything okay?” Maggie’s eyebrows draw a worried line.

She watches as Sydney clenches her jaw and leans forward and-

-suddenly, Sydney’s lips are on hers. She feels her right hand on her cheek, her chest against hers, and her lips a little too forceful on her own. Maggie freezes in surprise for a fraction of a second, then reaches up to cup Sydney’s cheek. Right as Maggie starts to kiss her back, Sydney withdraws with wide eyes.

“I-uh-sor-“ Sydney rushes out before she finishes her sentence.

The door to the greenhouse flaps in the wind since Sydney didn’t close it all the way. Maggie is left alone with the umbrella flowers and touches a hand to her lips.

Well, it looks like she may not be the only one with a crush. A relieved smile bursts across her face as she feels a warmth in her chest, even though she’s slightly worried since Sydney ran away. She’s going to have to find Sydney tomorrow to figure out exactly what’s going on.


	5. Chapter 5

Maggie doesn’t see Sydney all weekend. She wishes she could say she knows better, but she knows Sydney is avoiding her. They usually eat lunch as a group with Alex and Zach after their separate classes during the weekdays and brunch in the mornings on the weekends. Sydney is an early riser, so she’s usually been at the table for a few hours reading before Maggie and company show up. But Maggie doesn’t catch a single glance of the redhead after their kiss. She feels her heart twist up inside. Did she do something wrong? Sydney was the one who initiated the kiss! Maybe Maggie was a failed experiment for her? All Maggie knows for sure is that she dreads seeing Sydney in Potions on Monday.

Sydney is already sitting at their table when Maggie shows up a minute before the bell rings. She figured that she could save herself from the awkwardness if she didn’t show up early so she could avoid their usual before class chats. Maggie slowly approaches the table and sets her bag down, then sits on her stool. Sydney appears heavily invested in her book, even if her ear turns a slight shade of red when Maggie sits. Maggie bites her lip and pulls her Potions kit out. It looks like they’re going to have to work in an uncomfortable silence for an hour and a half. Great. Next to her, Sydney shuts her eyes and sighs.

“Good morning,” she manages to utter, but she’s still looking straight down.

Maggie looks over at her with worry clearly written on her face. “Morning,” she shakily lets out.

They don’t get past that because Professor Snape bursts forth from his office. “Today you will be making the Draught of Peace. Powdered unicorn horn is on my desk.” And with that he turns away to sit at his desk and glare at the class.

Sydney lights a fire under her cauldron and flips her textbook to the right page as Maggie does the same. Maggie’s face turns to shock as she reads the seventeen steps. Why was the Draught of _Peace_ so complicated to make? She turns to Sydney, who looks impassively down at her textbook. Of course she’s not fazed. 

“Have you made this before?” Maggie asks worryingly. 

Sydney tilts her head to finally make eye contact with her. “No, I haven’t.”

The air is still awkward between the two, but Maggie tries to suck up her pride.

“I guess we can try to work together?” she asks hopefully.

Sydney frowns. “We’re graded individually.” Her eyes pierce into Maggie’s.

Maggie sighs as her face falls.

Sydney rubs a hand over her eyebrow and gives in. “I can help you if you have any questions, Maggie.”

“Thank you!” Maggie puts her hands together and bows.

She doesn’t see Sydney’s lips twitch up at the gesture.

Thank goodness Sydney is such a genius because this is the most complicated potion Maggie’s ever made. There are so many color changes and precise adjustments to make, but Maggie takes it slowly. She peeks out of the corner of her eye to Sydney’s cauldron. Predictably, she’s already at the halfway mark indicated by the orange liquid in front of her. Sweat drips down the side of Sydney’s face, which is the only sign that she’s not as comfortable brewing this as she is with others. Maggie can’t help but look a little longer. Sydney’s got a beautiful profile; the sharp angle of her jaw, the curve of her neck-

Maggie shakes her head and returns to her own cauldron. She’s impatiently waiting for her potion to turn purple for the second time. It bubbles happily as she sighs. She’s really been sighing a lot lately. 

“Turn your flames down and let it simmer, not boil,” Sydney suddenly suggests from next to her.

“Oh,” Maggie starts. “Thanks.” Maggie points her wand at her fire and lowers the flames.

Sydney grimaces in response. She’s focused on her kit, where she pulls out porcupine quills. One by one she carefully drops the quills into her cauldron. She half hopes that Maggie is paying attention because the other girl has the occasional tendency to splash her potions over the rim of her cauldron when she overenthusiastically drops items into them. 

Her stool screeches on the floor as she stands up to approach Professor Snape’s desk. He pays her no mind as she collects powdered unicorn horn into a flask, but raises an eyebrow when she takes too much. He stays silent as she returns to her desk. Perhaps Ms. Katz isn’t as gifted as he thought.

Sydney divides the powdered unicorn horn in half and drops what she needs into her cauldron. 

“Here,” she says to Maggie as she places the flask on her side of the table.

Maggie looks surprised, mouth opening but not speaking immediately. “Thanks,” she replies quickly as she breaks their eye contact quickly.

She glares at her potion. It’s orange like Sydney’s was earlier, but she doesn’t understand how she’s always so far behind the other girl. She wishes so badly to be as talented, but no matter what she does, she always seems to need help. _There’s no use thinking about that now_ , she tells herself. 

Professor Snape makes his rounds when there’s only half an hour left. He starts at the back where someone’s potion decides to explode, and the sudden noise causes Maggie to jump and hit her knee on the top of the table. 

“Ouch!” she exclaims. That’s going to leave a deep purple bruise. She’s just glad she didn’t knock her cauldron off the table. 

She hesitantly looks over at Sydney, hoping she wasn’t bothered. Sydney hides a smile as she stirs her potion. Maggie’s cute even when doesn’t mean to be.

Professor Snape does his batlike walk to them last, looking into Maggie’s cauldron first, as usual. It’s like he wants to save the best for last even though he’s not sentimental like that. Maggie’s potion is grey and simmering. She waits with bated breath to see what Snape will say this time. He gives her potion a half nod and turns to Sydney’s. Maggie exhales slowly and inwardly fist pumps at receiving such a positive review. Sydney’s potion is in the process from turning orange to white as she stirs in more porcupine quills. Snape blinks in mild surprise. It appears that the extra powdered unicorn she took did not go into her potion. He nods and gives what might be a smile to Sydney. No one’s sure because his thin lips just twitch a little. 

It’s been clear to the class since day one that Sydney is his favorite, and they always pay special attention to his judgements of her work. Most of their classmates think Sydney finally messed up because Snape didn’t say anything, and grin at each other.

“Looks like miss perfect Prefect can mess up too,” Sydney hears behind her back. She chooses to ignore the comment and lowers the heat under her cauldron.

Maggie, though, turns around to fix a glare at the boy who said that. She turns back around when she feels Sydney’s hand touch her arm.

“Don’t bother,” she mutters, then withdraws her hand before focusing on her potion again.

Maggie looks down to where Sydney touched her. She blinks at the warmth in her chest and turns back to her textbook again.

* * *

Maggie walks toward her usual lunch spot at the Hufflepuff table. Alex and Zach are already there, and she looks for the usual bright spot of red hair across from them. To her surprise, Sydney is sitting there too…with a boy Maggie’s never seen before next to her. 

She sits down on Sydney’s left, carefully putting her bag at her feet. 

“Hi everyone,” she greets somewhat uneasily. Alex narrows her eyes at her for a second but smiles and says “hi”. 

Sydney turns to her. “Maggie, I’d like for you to meet Herschel,” she says with a smile. 

The boy next to her is wearing a Ravenclaw tie and extends a hand. “It’s a pleasure to finally meet you,” he says with a polite smile.

Maggie arches her eyebrow at the “finally”. How long has Sydney known him?

“Herschel’s my boyfriend,” Sydney chimes in. 

Maggie’s eyes go wide as her stomach drops. “Oh, I didn’t know you were dating anyone!” So did their kiss count as cheating?

“It’s only been two days,” Sydney replies with a smile that Maggie can tell is fake as she scratches the back of her head. Herschel smiles in the background as Maggie raises an eyebrow.

“So Herschel, tell me about yourself,” Zach says to break the silence.

So Sydney avoided her for two days and got herself a boyfriend immediately after they kissed. Interesting. Well, Maggie figures, if Sydney’s not interested in her, she might as well move on. There’s no use getting hung up on a straight girl who’s got a boyfriend.

And it hurts, since she likes Sydney so much, but she can still keep her as a friend. She just has to kill her feelings somehow…and you know what they say: the best way to get over someone is to get under someone else.


	6. Chapter 6

Maggie stands on her tiptoes in the library, trying to reach for _Flesh-Eating Trees of the World_. Why the librarian had to put it up so high, she doesn’t know. 

“Here, let me get that for you.” A male voice comes from behind her. 

Maggie moves to the side a little as her helper reaches up to grab the book, his chest brushing against her shoulder.

“Here you go, Maggie,” he says with a boyish grin.

“James! I haven’t seen you in a while!” James Dey stands next to her in all his tall glory and puts his hands on his hips, not dropping his smile. “How have you been?” she asks.

“Oh, studying for N.E.W.T.S. Arithmancy is harder than I thought.” James is a seventh year, so he and Maggie don’t cross paths very often. He adjusts his blue Ravenclaw tie. “How are you? We should catch up!”

“I’m good! Do you want to go to lunch with me?” Maggie smiles up at him.

“It would be a pleasure.”

* * *

Sydney doesn’t see much of Maggie outside of Potions and their normal lunches together. They only go to the greenhouses once a week, and those are awkward affairs since they both have to push down the memory of what had happened weeks before. Maggie seems more reserved around her now, and they are just…out of sync. Of course Sydney had to go and ruin the first real friendship she made. Why did she have to kiss her? She could have held in her feelings and…what? Gotten over her? 

But now Sydney’s in this sham of a relationship. She can’t let anyone know that she’s-that she’s-she can’t let anyone know about her. She hopes to God that Maggie hasn’t told anyone about what happened, and she stays with Herschel to maintain the appearance of normalcy. She prays to God every night, hands clasped so tightly that her knuckles are white, hoping that this is just a test, hoping that she’s not actually into girls. Sydney is a good Jewish girl; she’s obeys Kashrut, she dresses conservatively, and she loves God. But God doesn’t seem to love her lately. 

Sydney has been with Herschel for three weeks now and she can barely stand physical contact with him. He’s a good looking boy and very kind and intelligent, but she’s just not attracted to him. She’s lucky that he’s hesitant in their relationship and doesn’t try for much-yet. He holds her hand sometimes, and Sydney can’t help but compare how big his hand is to Maggie’s smaller and softer one. She remembers how Maggie cupped her cheek so tenderly that night- _stop_. She shouldn’t be thinking about her. Herschel’s kissed her a few times, too. Just little pecks, but Sydney is almost disgusted when he leans in. She sucks it up and bears with it as best she can, but she doesn’t know what to do when he wants more. Herschel has everything in a boy her parents want for her to date. He’s Orthodox like she is, comes from a wealthy family, and treats her right. Sydney would love him as a friend, but as a boyfriend, he’s just not right for her. She pushes down the thought that no man is right for her.

But back to Maggie. Sydney punches her pillow a little too harshly as she thinks about Maggie again. She’s recently invited her own boy to their lunch table. James Dey. He’s in Herschel’s House, but Herschel doesn’t know anything about him. Sydney always stays quiet as she watches Maggie flirt with James. The touches on the arm, the leaning in, the glances…Sydney doesn’t have the right to be jealous since she’s the one who ran away, but she feels it every time. It’s the burn rising in her chest, the clenching of her fists, and the frown on her mouth. Either Maggie wasn’t interested in her at all, or she’s playing some sort of game to make Sydney jealous. Both options are unbearable.

Sydney stares at the ceiling. She imagines doing the things she does with Herschel but with Maggie instead. God doesn’t punish thoughts, anyway. In her mind she sees Maggie holding her hand as they sit across from each other in a teashop. She sees Maggie walking in front of her, then turning around to smile at her lovingly. She sees Maggie pulling her in for a kiss in a field of flowers. Sydney is filled with such longing, with a burn in her heart and in her throat, that she can’t help but let a few tears loose. They trail down her cheeks onto her pillowcase and she doesn’t bother to wipe them away.

* * *

A week later finds Sydney wandering the halls of Hogwarts. She’s supposed to be on Prefect duty, but she’s lost in thought. No matter how much she tries, she’s starting to realize something. Something that terrifies her, but it’s something she can’t change. It’s something she was born with; it’s in her brain chemistry, her brain anatomy, and her hormones. Science is on her side, but God…will God still love her if she chooses to live like this? To live true to herself?

_I like girls._

She can’t say it aloud; she can barely say it in her head.

She hears giggles echoing across the walls and they seem to be coming from the staircase behind her.

Maggie and James appear, laughing at some joke James made. They spot Sydney and smile and wave.

“Hey, Sydney, how’s it going?” James has an easy smile while Maggie looks a little nervous.

“Just on Prefect duty,” she replies. “Where are you off to?” she has to add even though she knows they’re finding somewhere to canoodle.

“We’re going to explore the seventh floor. Apparently there’s something interesting up there,” James says. Maggie bites her lip, a quirk Sydney knows well by now.

Sydney’s eyebrows draw together a little as her eyes flicker between the two. She knows all about what goes on in that seventh floor room.

“Have a good time,” Sydney responds blankly.

Maggie hesitates for a second, then offers, “You should come with us.” 

James stares at her in disbelief for a quick second. “Yeah,” he says. He clears his throat. “You should come with us. That would be…great.” 

Sydney and Maggie don’t miss the change of atmosphere. Sydney looks at James and lets her gaze fall on Maggie. Her eyes say “come with me” and Sydney can’t ignore that.

“Okay.”

* * *

Snow falls around Maggie and Sydney as they head to the greenhouse. It’s been two weeks since they had walked around the seventh floor corridor together with James, and Sydney hasn’t seen the boy around much since then. 

“Is everything okay between you and James?” she asks with her hands curling into fists in her cloak pockets.

Maggie glances at her. “Oh, we don’t talk much anymore. He’s always studying and we were never really a _thing_ anyway.”

Sydney feels a sense of relief in her chest.

“How it going between you and Herschel?” Maggie asks, her tone carefully innocent.

“It’s good. Nothing new.” Sydney’s response is equally measured.

“I feel like there’s something you want to tell me, Syd.” Maggie would stop in her tracks for this serious conversation if it weren’t snowing. “You’ve been thinking about something for a while now.”

Sydney inhales. “No, nothing really.” _I like girls_. “Oh! _Brews for the Bombastic_ is coming out in a few weeks! I can’t wait to get my hands on that!” That’s the first thing she can think of, and she has to admit it’s pretty weak.

Maggie lets it go, though. “Did you preorder it, nerd?” she jokes.

Sydney breaks into a relieved smile and bumps her shoulder against Maggie’s. “I’m sure I’m not the only one, _nerd_.”

Maggie holds her hand over her heart. “Oh, you got me there!”

The two laugh as they reach the final steps down toward Greenhouse 4. They haven’t enjoyed their easy banter in months.

Sydney opens the door to the greenhouse and ushers Maggie in. “Hurry, it’s freezing!”

The door shuts behind them and they bask in the warmth. Sydney shrugs off her cloak, leaving her in her normal clothes. She folds it neatly and puts it on a bench with her gloves as Maggie unzips her own. They take turns leading the walking plants to alcoves to rest, watering the non-hydrophobic plants, and singing to the plants in the corner that sway with the music.

“Oh look, they have olomoroses!” Maggie points to the vibrant red flowers that are sitting next to the Mimbulus mimbletonia. “These flowers smell like the thing you desire most!”

Maggie leads the way to the olomoroses, Sydney following behind. She walks on autopilot as she debates with herself in her mind. _Tell her! You owe her the truth! She’s your best friend!_

_I owe her nothing! True friends wait for secrets to be told!_

_She suspects something is wrong; you can’t lie to her!_

_She’ll understand why I waited! This is a big thing!_

_Just say it!_

_I-_

_I like girls._

But Sydney can’t say it yet. If she can’t say it to herself, she can’t tell Maggie, not yet.

Maggie leans over and smells the roses with her eyes closed. Her nostrils fill with the scent of…vanilla? Maggie’s never been a huge fan of vanilla. She doesn’t mind it, but she wouldn’t go out of her way to buy vanilla candles or anything. Maybe the roses are still premature.

“Hmm, give it a shot, Syd. I think these might not be ready.” Maggie backs up to give Sydney space.

Sydney bends down to smell the roses. A scent she recognizes very well meets her. She backs away quickly, blinking rapidly. “I think you’re right, Maggie. They may be premature.”

She sits down to stop her head from spinning. Maggie frowns and takes a seat across from her, sitting Indian style. 

“What’s wrong?” 

Sydney talks to the wooden planks that make up the floor. “Nothing-I just-probably didn’t drink enough water before coming here. My head-“

Maggie reaches out and took her hand. “Hey,” she says softly. Sydney looks up to meet her eyes. “You don’t have to lie to me, Syd. I’m your friend and I’m always here for you. I know you’re not ready to tell me whatever you’re hiding in that big brain of yours, but I’ll be here for you when you are.” She smiles as she finishes her sentence.

Sydney looks down at their joined hands. Warmth fills every inch of her body. This is what being with Herschel should feel like. This is what she wants to feel like all the time. 

_I like girls_ runs through her head.

“Thanks, Maggie. I-“ she pauses. “I haven’t been fair to you.”

“These things take time! Don’t worry,” Maggie reassures her. She lets go of her hand and puts both hands on the ground to push herself up.

Sydney stands up as well.

“Honestly, I don’t think Herschel knows you very well. I know you’ve been dating for months, but he doesn’t know you as well-“ Maggie pauses. They both know that sentence ends in _as well as I do_. “-as well as he should.”

Sydney crosses her arms. “He’s trying.” She doesn’t know why she’s defending him.

Maggie leans back against the olomoroses as vanilla fills her nostrils again. “I don’t know, you just…deserve the best.”

She looks at Sydney in a way she can’t deduce. Maggie’s fingers drum on the table behind her as most of her weight is back on it.

Sydney uncrosses her arms and takes a slow step toward the other girl. She feels something come over her, something…brave. Something very unlike her. _Tell her! Tell her! Tell her!_

Maggie looks at her expectantly but patiently.

Sydney takes another step, then another until they’re barely a foot apart. _Say it._

She looks Maggie right in the eyes. 

“I like girls,” she almost whispers. “There, I said it.” She sighs and quickly looks down then back up again.

Maggie smiles softly. “Thank you for telling me.” She takes her hands off the table behind her so she stands up to her full height.

Sydney takes another step closer, gauging Maggie’s reaction. Maggie’s eyes fall to her lips and back up to her face. Sydney makes her decision.

She cups Maggie’s face, just like the first time, but more gently as she brings her lips to meet Maggie’s. Maggie responds immediately, bringing her hands to cradle Sydney’s face. Maggie is clearly an experienced kisser, but lets Sydney take the lead. Sydney’s other hand comes around to Maggie’s back, pulling her even closer so they’re chest to chest. She deepens the kiss, feeling Maggie respond enthusiastically. Maggie removes both hands from Sydney’s cheeks to land low on her waist. She keeps them there to be sure that Sydney is okay with her moving forward. Sydney moans into her mouth and pushes her back against the table. Maggie slowly runs her hand under the hem of Sydney’s sweater, feeling the warm skin underneath. Sydney shivers and sighs into Maggie’s mouth, then turns her head to kiss down Maggie’s jaw. Maggie groans as she feels Sydney’s tongue on her neck and one of Sydney’s hands drifting down toward her ass.

They kiss for what feels like hours until the sun starts to set, causing the temperature to drop. Until then, all Maggie can feel is Sydney pressed against her, holding her tight, kissing her like there’s no tomorrow. All she can taste is the sweetness of Sydney’s mouth. All she can smell is the vanilla shampoo from Sydney’s hair lingering in the air, then clinging to her clothes that night as she lies in bed, tossing and turning, unable to sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope y'all enjoyed this chapter. I'm very proud of it. I invented "olomoroses" out of sheer uncreativity. It comes from "olor" which means smell in Spanish, "amor" which means love in a few languages, and roses. Great, huh?


	7. Chapter 7

Maggie’s aimlessly walking up the staircase to the fourth floor, thoughts rushing through her head. She hasn’t seen Sydney since they made out in the greenhouse the previous day, and Maggie skipped breakfast since she isn’t ready to confront her about what’s happening between them. Sydney’s dating Herschel but she confessed that she likes girls. Does that make Maggie the mistress of sorts? She thinks the current terminology is side ho? Or is she the real ho (she frowns…maybe that’s not the right word)? Either way, she doesn’t know where she stands. Sydney seems to be fine living a lie, but it’s not fair to Maggie because she doesn’t know what to do about her feelings. The other girl is almost leading her on.

She hears quick steps behind her. Looks like someone is in a hurry. Maggie continues her slow trek upwards as the person behind her seems to hesitate, slowing down their ascent. 

“Maggie,” she hears Sydney call from behind her. Maggie shuts her eyes and grimaces. Just the person she’s not ready to talk to. She takes a deep breath and turns around.

There’s Sydney, looking as pristine and put together as always. Her hair is shiny, her tie is tight and centered, and her Prefect badge reflects the lights from the floating candles around them. Maggie, on the other hand, has looked disheveled since she got out of bed. She got up late that morning, grabbed an apple from her nightstand, and has been walking around ever since. Her hair is tied into a messy bun, her tie is askew, and her rolled sleeves are falling down.

“I didn’t see you this morning. Are you okay?” Sydney gives her a worried look.

Maggie raises her eyebrows, incredulous. “Am I okay? No, I’m not okay!”

Sydney takes a half step back, surprised. “What’s wrong?” she asks.

“What’s _wrong_?” Maggie crosses her arms. “We need to talk. Like have a serious talk.”

Sydney twists her mouth, looking uncomfortable. “Maggie…what happened between us was-“

“An accident? Don’t you dare tell me that. You kissed me first-again!” Maggie can’t keep the anger and confusion out of her voice.

Sydney looks around them wildly to make sure no one’s listening. She holds up her hands. “Okay, okay, we can talk. Let’s just go somewhere quieter.”

Maggie scoffs but lets Sydney lead the way. She fumes behind the other girl, following her to an empty classroom. Sydney shuts the door after Maggie enters, then leans her back against it. Maggie is standing against a desk, arms still crossed.

“So tell me what’s going on. Am I just a safe girl for you to kiss whenever you feel like it?” Sydney’s never seen Maggie like this before.

She pauses before answering. “You’re more than that, Maggie. You’re a great friend-“ Maggie scoffs again at that but Sydney presses on. “-and I’m still figuring things out.”

“What’s more to figure out? You told me you like girls!”

Sydney musters every ounce of bravery in her body. “Why are you so worried? You don’t have feelings for me, do you?” She feels her heart drop like it’s on a string and tenses just by asking the question. There, now it’s out in the open.

Maggie is taken aback by the question. She stays silent, not ready to admit her feelings. She still can’t risk it. “I-I just don’t want to be someone you mess around with while you have a boyfriend.”

“I’m not using you, Maggie, I swear.” _You don’t know how much you mean to me._ But Sydney’s not ready to date a girl yet. She’s a cornerstone of the small Orthodox Jewish community at Hogwarts. She’s terrified of what others would think of her if she came out, much less started dating a girl. Sydney’s always known who she is: successful, conservative, and faithful, but now she’s shaken up with this new factor in her life. She knows has to keep the appearance of the good heterosexual Jewish girl to survive.

“Then what am I to you?” Maggie’s almost pleading at this point.

“You’re my-“ Sydney pauses for a the briefest amount of time. She watches every fantasy, every dream she’s had of being with Maggie fade away. She says goodbye to the images of lazy morning kisses, cuddles before a fireplace, picnics by the Great Lake, and exploring new cities with Maggie’s hand in hers in that fraction of a second. “-best friend.”

Maggie lets her face fall. “Okay.” She still thinks Sydney may feel something for her, but she knows she’s won’t do anything about it. She narrows her eyes. “No more kissing then. No more fooling around. If I’m your best friend, then that’s I can be for you.”

Sydney nods as her heart sinks into her stomach.

“Okay.”

* * *

“Sydney? Are you okay?” Herschel’s voice calls out as Sydney sits with him in the Ravenclaw Common Room. They’re reading the Torah together, but Sydney had zoned out.

“Oh, yes, I was just thinking.” She smiles and pats his hand.

“Did you and Maggie fight?” He’s more perceptive than she gives him credit for.

“What makes you think that?” Sydney withdraws her hand and crosses it over her stomach.

“You don’t seem as close as you used to be. I remember you guys used to hang out all the time. Now you’re here with me more often. Not that I’m complaining.” Herschel gives her a hesitant smile.

Sydney tries to smile back. “Friendships have their ups and downs. We’re just going through something right now.”

Herschel nods. “I hope you resolve it soon. I know how much you mean to each other.”

Sydney feels guilt well up inside her. Herschel’s such a nice guy; he doesn’t deserve to be in a fake relationship with her. Well, it’s real for him, but…she can’t bring herself to tell him. She needs him. He makes her look normal so no one will catch on. Maybe she can try with him. Maybe if she stays with him long enough she’ll be attracted to him. Maybe God will have mercy and make her into guys.

* * *

But God doesn’t do that for her. As the days pass, Sydney finds herself more and more repelled by Herschel. Not because of who he is, of course, but because he’s a man. He’s been trying to initiate longer kisses with her and she’s running out of excuses. She can’t stand being physical with him; it’s so disgusting. And Herschel’s patient, but she suspects that will run out soon.

Although Maggie’s not around as often, she’s still running through her mind. Sydney plays the scenarios over and over again. What if she had told Maggie how she felt? Would she have reciprocated? Would she have run away? Maggie was so receptive a week ago in the greenhouse. Maybe she felt something for her after all. But there was no use thinking about that now. Sydney herself had shut down what could have been.

And now she and Maggie haven’t rekindled their old friendship yet. They still talk a bit during Potions, but there’s a rift between them. Sydney hates herself for ruining what they once had by kissing Maggie both those times. She wishes she could turn back time and hold in her feelings all the way.

Sydney dips her quill into ink. (She wishes they could use pens; they’re so much more convenient. Sometimes wizarding folk make things so unnecessarily complicated.) O.W.L.S. are in a few months and she’s in full study mode (minus interruptions by her thoughts of Maggie). She’s been cooped up in her room more often, rejecting offers from Alex and the rare offers from Maggie to hang out or go to Hogsmeade. Sydney figures that the less time she spends with Maggie, the sooner she can get over her. She doesn’t need any distractions from her studies, anyway. Those come before everything else.

* * *

It’s stormy the day she breaks up with Herschel. They’re sitting together in an alcove with a window watching the rain fall when he brings up their future.

“Are we in a serious relationship, Syd?” She cringes on the inside. The way he says “Syd” is all wrong. When Maggie says it, it’s full of _something_. Something intimate between them that others can’t have. It doesn’t mean anything when it comes out of Herschel’s mouth.

“What do you mean?” Sydney wants to avoid this conversation the best she can.

“I think we are,” he replies. “I mean, I’ve told my family about you…and I can see a future with you.”

Sydney swallows. “Yes, I really like you, Herschel.” Her voice wavers. “You’re-“ She falters. How long can she maintain this lie? He doesn’t deserve to be lied to and she doesn’t deserve to lie to herself anymore. She likes girls. She’s-she’s-.

Sydney hangs her head. “I can’t do this to you,” she whispers.

Herschel looks at her. “Do what?”

“I can’t be with you, Herschel. I’m-I’m gay,” she says as tears fill her eyes. There, it’s out there. It’s out there for everyone to find out. 

Herschel smiles at first like it’s a joke. “You’re gay?” His face falls when he sees Sydney’s tears. “You’re gay?!” His face contorts in disgust as her tears fill her eyes, almost completely distorting her vision.

“The whole time we’ve been dating? You’ve been-gay?” He backs up and puts as much space between them as possible.

Sydney nods sadly. “I can’t lie anymore. I can’t be with you anymore.”

Herschel shakes his head, his look of disgust deepening. He suddenly stands up and storms away, his footsteps echoing down the hall.

Sydney brings a hand to her face as her tears finally fall.

* * *

Sydney cries alone in the alcove until she’s almost out of tears. Her head feels heavy and her eyes are puffy, and she’s glad she’s in such a deserted location so that no one’s passed by. She watches the rain fall outside, covering the ground in shallow rivers as the weather matches her mood.

“Syd?” Maggie’s voice suddenly calls out to her.

Sydney jumps and wipes her eyes. It’s futile, though, since she knows she can’t hide what her face looks like. 

Maggie walks up to where she’s standing. “I saw Herschel in the hallway looking furious so I came to look for you.” Her voice is soft. “What happened?” She sits, filling the empty space Herschel had vacated half an hour ago.

“I told him. I told him that I’m-that I’m-“ Sydney can’t say it again but Maggie nods her head in understanding.

“And then he walked away?”

Sydney nods silently and looks straight at Maggie, cry face be damned. “What am I doing, Maggie?”

Maggie smiles empathetically. “You’re following your heart.”

And Sydney knows she doesn’t deserve Maggie as a friend since she can forgive her and come to her aid so easily. Maggie is so trustworthy and she has such a big heart that Sydney knows she can’t match.

“Am I going to be okay?” Sydney asks helplessly.

Maggie takes her hand. Sydney embraces the warmth at once, even if she feels tendrils of her feelings rise again. She pushes them down, telling herself that they’re friends. 

“You’re going to be fine.” 

Sydney doubts that, but she doesn’t say anything back. She’s just given up her community, her normalcy, her sense of identity that she had held onto for so long. She’s on a new path forward, and for once, she can’t see where it leads. Sydney is terrified. What is she going to do from here?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to everyone for following this story and for the kind reviews! I kind of feel like I'm rushing it, so feedback is appreciated!


	8. Chapter 8

January finds Sydney huddled in a full winter ensemble as she walks outside. Three feet of snow cover every inch of the ground, and most of the students declare an impromptu snow day. She carries with her a jar with bluebell flames to keep warm and hopes she doesn’t drop it. 

Suddenly, she feels a muffled thump as something hits her back and falls onto the snow. Sydney huffs and turns around with an icy glare. She has a very important piece of parchment in her pocket, and she won’t forgive anyone who damages it.

Maggie’s not very apologetic face meets her eyes. Her heart swoops low; she hasn’t seen or talked to Maggie since they left for Winter Break one month ago. She’s thought about her plenty of times, but didn’t even know how to contact her outside of school. She also doesn’t know if she would have contacted her out of school, anyway.

Sydney quickly pulls out her wand; she always has it within a hand’s reach. She silently casts a spell to hurl a foot of snow at Maggie’s face.

“Holy sh-“ Maggie dives to the left out of the way, narrowly avoiding Sydney’s projectile.

Maggie catches her breath and puts her hands on her knees. “Remind me to never throw a snowball at you again,” she says seriously.

Sydney cautiously smiles. “How was your break?”

“It was good! I’m not looking forward to studying again for O.W.L.S., though.” 

Sydney nods. “If you need any help, just let me know.”

Maggie’s surprised at the offer, but she smiles back.

* * *

It’s Valentine’s Day and a mushy air fills the Great Hall. Couples are making out with abandon at every table or are just being overall disgustingly romantic. Alex and Charlie are keeping it more subtle, simply holding hands on top of the table. Maggie and Sydney sit across from them, feeling like it’s an awkward double date. 

“So what are your plans for Valentine’s, you lovebirds?” Maggie asks while Sydney pushes food around her plate.

“Nothing big, just hanging out,” Charlie answers.

“Charlie got me this beautiful necklace!” Alex exclaims, holding out the chain around her neck for everyone to see. It’s gold with a heart pendant in the middle.

“Nice!” Maggie nods, impressed. 

“It’s beautiful,” Sydney says.

Alex looks lovingly into Charlie’s eyes and they lean in for a kiss. Maggie diverts her attention by turning her head quickly-in the wrong direction (she had a 50/50 chance, okay?)-to look at Sydney. She’s not surprised to see Sydney looking right back at her with a jokingly disgusted expression.

“Chocolate?” Maggie offers her one of the many boxes of chocolates sitting on the tables.

Sydney hesitates before reaching out to take one.

They walk together after lunch, heading toward the library to study during their free period.

“Is it normal to do that kind of flashy stuff for Valentine’s?” Sydney asks.

“Yeah, especially when it’s a guy giving a present. They think the gaudier, the better. I’ve had big old heart earrings given to me before! Didn’t wear them once,” Maggie replies with a laugh.

Sydney is silent. She thinks that she wouldn’t be a very good gift-giver. She shows affection in other ways, not like she would know for sure since she’s never dated anyone seriously before.

Maggie bumps her shoulder. “Whatcha thinking about?”

Sydney pauses. “I’ve never done romantic stuff like that before. I guess I wouldn’t know what to do.”

“Well, when you know a person well enough, I think you’ll know.” And Sydney can’t help but think about what she would give Maggie if they were dating. Hypothetically, of course-as a thinking exercise. She’d probably take her somewhere private for a picnic of sorts and give her something simple like a bracelet. It wouldn’t be adorned with any gaudy hearts or anything. Then she would just want to be close to her. Hold her and talk about random things until the sun goes down. 

Maggie glances at her and smirks like she knows what Sydney’s thinking about. “Fantasizing, Syd?”

Sydney flushes. “No, just thinking. Did you know that St. Valentine supposedly wore an amethyst ring? That’s why it’s the birthstone for February.”

Maggie doesn’t miss the red creeping up Sydney’s neck toward her cheeks and ears but lets it go. 

“You’re just full of facts!” She’s used to Sydney dropping random trivia and loves it when she does. “I’m sure you’ll blow some girl’s mind one day, though.” She manages to keep the bitterness out of her voice.

Sydney smiles sadly at the floor. “One day.”

* * *

“Okay, what’s the most ubiquitous antidote component?” Sydney quizzes Maggie as they study together in an empty classroom. They’re side by side at one of the tables in the front with parchment full of notes and textbooks spread all over the place.

Maggie’s eyes droop. They’ve been at it for four hours after dinner, quizzing each other back and forth about Potions material. Her head drops, then she startles awake. 

“Huh? Oh, uh…a bezoar?” She half closes her eyes until she hears Sydney’s voice again.

“No, it’s the Mandrake. I said _component_ , Maggie.” Sydney shakes her head.

Maggie hums in half understanding until her head falls again. Her arm flies out on its own, pushing a book off the table, revealing a piece of parchment underneath. Maggie manages to read while half asleep “Thank you for applying” before Sydney gasps and reaches out to hide it.

“Maggie!”

Maggie lets her head fall to the side to rest on Sydney’s shoulder. “Just a second,” she mumbles out.

Sydney freezes, feeling the weight of Maggie’s head on her shoulder. She knows she has to continue studying, but…she can take a short break. Breaks are good for memory consolidation, as is sleep. She closes her book, and then her eyes, and slowly rests her head against Maggie’s. She knows that Maggie’s so tired she’ll forget about what the just read anyway.

* * *

Maggie bumps into someone speeding down the hallway after Charms. Well, more like the person barrels into her. They knock her bag off her arm and almost topple her over in their rush.

“Whoa!” She manages to regain her balance but she sees a large pile of books on the floor, and a figure stumbling on top of them.

“Syd?” The red hair is instantly recognizable. 

“Maggie!” Sydney looks completely different from what Maggie’s used to. She’s not bothering to wear her tie, her shirt is unbuttoned so Maggie can see some of her chest, her hair is sticking out a little bit, and she has deep purple eyebags under her eyes. 

It’s March and Maggie hasn’t seen her in two weeks outside of Potions. Sydney entered full study mode two weeks ago, telling Maggie she couldn’t help her out anymore. Maggie understood and told Sydney she knew how serious grades were for her, and that was that. Maggie misses their rekindled friendship, but she knows where Sydney’s priorities are.

“Here, let me help you.” They gather the books together and Maggie stacks the two she’s picked up on top of Sydney’s three. A familiar looking piece of parchment sticks out from between the pages of one of the books. Maggie tries to examine it more clearly before Sydney adjusts her grip so it’s hidden.

There’s an awkward silence as Maggie waits for Sydney to speak first and Sydney tries to find an excuse to leave as quickly as possible.

“Thanks,” she says. She smiles quickly then rushes away, leaving Maggie to stare at her back.

* * *

“You need to eat,” Maggie orders Sydney seriously.

Sydney has been skipping almost every meal to study, and Maggie can tell it’s had an effect on her. Sydney is skinnier, hollows showing in her cheeks. The eyebags are permanent, and she has been doing the bare minimum for Prefect duty. 

Sydney gives a noncommittal grunt. Maggie had somehow found her hidden in the library and dropped a sandwich on the table, then sitting across from her and tapping her fingers until Sydney had looked up. 

Maggie points at the sandwich. “It’s chicken, lettuce, tomato, and pesto. Your favorite. I’m not leaving until you eat the whole thing.”

The other girl looks up from her book to glare at her, then back down again to continue reading.

Maggie pulls the book toward her to force Sydney to take her seriously. She receives an annoyed look, but won’t give in.

“Since you want to be a Healer you should know that you need to take care of your body,” Maggie says with the most serious look she can muster in her own exhausted state. She’s worried about Sydney, but the other girl doesn’t seem to care about herself. “You probably know enough to ace every N.E.W.T. by now, anyway. Don’t put so much pressure on yourself, Syd. You and I both know you’re more than prepared.”

Sydney closes her eyes and sighs. “I guess you’re right.” She reaches for the sandwich, even though Madame Pince would kill her for eating in the library.

“Thanks,” she says reluctantly but gratefully.

* * *

Maggie bends over to read the first question on her Potions O.W.L. Her heartbeat rings in her ears and her hands shake, but she thinks she’s ready. She’s had Sydney help her for months now, and she’s actually a pretty good teacher, even though she’s straight to the point and allows for no mistakes. Even without Sydney’s help recently, Maggie’s been studying pretty hard, too. She can do it.

She reads the first question. _Write the name of the most commonly used component in everyday potions_. She smirks as she writes down the answer without hesitation.

* * *

Alex buries her head in her hands. “I just know I failed Defense Against the Dark Arts. I couldn’t get rid of that damn boggart!” 

Maggie pats her shoulder. She’s still shaking from the leftover endorphins coursing through her system after finishing her last O.W.L. She feels confident that she’s at least passed each one. _I need to find Syd and thank her for everything she’s done for me this year,_ she thinks. _And get her number so I can text her over break._

But she doesn’t see Sydney again. She looks all over the castle, fast walking from the greenhouses to the top of the Astronomy Tower, Sydney nowhere to be found. Maggie can’t help but feel hurt. They had repaired their friendship, even if they were both studying like crazy and didn’t have much time for anything else lately. Now Sydney doesn’t even bother to keep in touch after the stress is gone.

She sighs and sits on the steps of the Tower. 

“Hey Maggie, what are you doing up here?”

Zach’s friendly tone makes her look up. 

“I’ve been looking for Syd. I can’t find her anywhere,” she says miserably.

His face falls. “Oh, she didn’t tell you? She moved out right after exams finished. She’s got an internship at St. Mungo’s that lasts until seventh year begins.” He pauses. “I really thought she would have told you something like that. I saw her working on her application all term. That piece of parchment was _wrinkled!_ ” He raises his eyebrows just thinking about it.

And Maggie remembers now all the times she saw it. “Why didn’t she tell me?” she mutters.

Zach sits next to her and pats her back. “You’ll see her again, Mags. You can send letters to St. Mungo’s and stuff!”

“No, she’s not the type to keep in touch. I wouldn’t want to bother her, anyway.”

Zach frowns. “I don’t think you would be. You’re best friends!” He lets his arm rest around her shoulder.

Maggie groans and puts her head on her knees.

“Yup, best friends.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm going on a business trip until Friday, so I probably won't update until the weekend. Thank you as always to my loyal commenters! Y'all keep me going.


	9. Chapter 9

“Ten more coming by Floo Powder!” the Head Healer calls. 

Sydney steels herself for the incoming patients. She rolls up the sleeves of her light blue cloak that signifies she is a Healing Intern, in contrast to the lime green robes Healers and yellow Trainee Healers wear. Concerns race through her mind. Apparently there is a huge battle going on at Hogwarts and patients have been emergency rushed to St. Mungo’s. She thinks back to her friends and pray they are okay. It has been almost a year since she had left Hogwarts without saying goodbye to anyone. She can’t remember the last time she spoke individually to any of her friends…well, that’s not true. She remembers the last time she saw Maggie. Maggie had sat in front of her in the library and forced her to eat a sandwich before she left with a satisfied smile. She jerks herself back to the present. She’s about to be tasked with saving lives. She doesn’t have time to reminisce about the past. But…did Maggie fight? Is she okay? Are her friends okay?

“Katz, take stretcher four!” 

“Yes!” Sydney approaches the stretcher. The person on it is unconscious with half their face disfigured as if a heavy object had smashed it. Another stretcher passes by and Sydney gives it a quick glance, her heart stopping when she sees who is on it. The button nose, the curve of her brow, it’s all too familiar. _Oh my God, Maggie!_ A thousand different thoughts race through her mind as her heartrate suddenly increases and stands still while the hustle of the hospital courses around her. She shakes her head. She doesn’t have time to get distracted. She has to take care of her patient.

Sydney operates with half her mind elsewhere. This is a relatively routine operation, so she luckily doesn’t make any mistakes, even if she’s slightly slower to respond to questions. The Healer in charge of her supervision nods approvingly at her work.

“Very well done, Sydney.” He claps her on the shoulder before moving elsewhere to examine other patients.

She barely hears the praise, all of her thoughts now on Maggie. She needs to find her and see if she’s okay. But someone calls out that twenty more people are Apparating and coming in by Floo, so she has to stay. Sydney shuts her eyes tightly and clenches her jaw. This is what she signed up for. She has to keep her feelings out of the operating room.

* * *

Maggie awakens, her head feeling like it’s weighed down with cement. The last thing she remembers is chasing a Death Eater through the rubble of the school, sending curse after curse at him. All of a sudden there was a huge explosion as a Blasting Curse hit a wall, sending blocks of cement flying through the air, and she can’t remember anything after that. 

She groans as she tries to open her eyes. She has no idea where she is, but she feels a dark haziness take over as she passes out again.

Maggie reaches consciousness again, this time with her heart racing as she’s more cognizant of her circumstances. Are her friends okay? Zach had been rounded up with the rest of the Slytherins, but he had escaped before he was ushered out and had been heading toward the Forbidden Forest the last time she had seen him. Alex and Charlie had sprinted to higher ground, yelling at her to follow them when the explosion hit. She doesn’t believe in God, but she prays anyway to Sydney’s God, the Christian God (wait, aren’t they the same?), a blanket prayer to the polytheistic Gods-any God that may be listening-to protect her friends. She doesn’t even know what time it is on what day. Maybe that was a week ago and everyone’s dead. Maybe it’s the same day and they’re still fighting. Maybe she’s dead. She hurts too much to do anything more but fall asleep again.

She finally manages to sit up without her head throbbing the third time she wakes up. There is a plastic cup filled with water and a straw on the table next to her, but she can’t lift her arm to reach it. A powerful thirst hits her. Her throat is parched and her tongue is dry and she needs that water! She stares longingly at the cup just a foot away, hoping that whatever magical power she has can be used without a wand to levitate it to her. 

A gentle knock on the door distracts her fruitless efforts. She takes her eyes off the water to look at the newcomer in the doorway. Her eyes widen and her heart speeds up at the sight of Sydney Katz. Maybe she is dead after all because she didn’t know this was the sight she wanted to see until just now.

Sydney looks so different it’s like she’s a different person. She wears her light blue robes with a casual confidence. Maggie’s always known Sydney was destined to be a great Healer, and she just looks like she was made to wear that outfit. Sydney’s hair is cut to her shoulders and she wears an expression of concern Maggie has never seen before.

Maggie tries to open her mouth to speak, but her throat is so dry she can’t let anything out.

Sydney hesitates at the door. “Can I come in?” 

Maggie nods. _You don’t need my permission,_ she says in her head. While this version of Sydney is confident in her abilities, Maggie has never seen her so hesitant, either.

She watches as Sydney approaches her side table and grabs the cup of water, putting the straw between Maggie’s lips. Maggie sucks up the water in record time, groaning in relief when she’s finished.

“Thanks,” she manages to croak as Sydney places the empty cup back on the table and sits down on a chair next to her bed.

“I was so worried about you,” Sydney starts. Her eyes are soulful and so beautiful that Maggie can’t look away. Damn it, she thought she had killed her feelings in the year that Sydney’s been gone. “I thought-“

“It’s okay,” Maggie interrupts her gently. “I’m fine.”

Sydney gives her a look. Now that’s an expression she’s used to. “You got yourself blown up fighting Death Eaters, Maggie. How can you be fine?”

Maggie breathes in. “Well, you’re here.”

Sydney pauses. “I am.” They hold their eye contact for a few seconds. It’s clear to both of them that something between them is still there. 

Maggie blinks, ending the moment. “Did we win?”

The other girl nods. “Yeah, You Know Who is dead.”

Maggie smiles. “Finally, there’s peace.” 

She suddenly jolts up, which makes her head spin. “Ouch…” Sydney bounds up from where she’s sitting to lay a hand on Maggie’s head.

“Are you okay?” she asks, in Healer mode.

“I’m fine. Just-do you know if Alex is okay? And Zach and Charlie? And Shahir?” She wraps two fingers around Sydney’s wrist to gently pull her hand away from her head.

Sydney withdraws her hand quickly and sits back down. “I don’t know. I didn’t see them here. I’m sorry, Maggie.”

Maggie nods and stays silent. Sydney’s still gazing at her in some way she can’t deduce. Her eyes are softer than she’s ever seen and Maggie makes a decision in that moment. 

“I think…I need to focus on myself for a while,” Maggie lets out. She’s not quite certain what that means, but she’s not ready to go through this again. The will we, won’t we is too much for her. Maybe she’s reading too much into the moment, maybe she’s not, but she needs to make things clear.

Sydney glances down for a fraction of a second then back into her eyes. “That…sounds like a plan.” She takes Maggie’s hand. Maggie hasn’t missed that she still hasn’t smiled the entire time she’s visited. Sydney looks to the empty water cup.

“I’ll get you some more water.”

Maggie grips her hand tightly as she tries to pull away. “Stay.”

Sydney looks down at their connected hands and back at Maggie’s face. She sits back down as Maggie gives her a tentative smile.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm currently writing two chapters I'm very excited to share with y'all. The first should be two away! Still deciding whether to slowburn y'all's asses or be nice. :P


	10. Chapter 10

Sydney visits her whenever she can, and they finally manage to talk for hours almost like they used to. 

“When can I go?” Maggie whines. It’s her fifth day in the ward and she’s antsy to leave. At least she’s found out her friends are alive and they’ve visited, but she wants to get out and start living again. Sydney chuckles and pats her hand.

“We just need to monitor you for a few more days.”

“Uggghhhhh I’m fine! I can walk, I can talk, and I can use the bathroom by myself! What more do I need?”

Sydney can’t help but laugh about how cute Maggie is. She really hasn’t changed that much since their Hogwarts days together. She checks her watch. It’s three ‘til four.

“Hey, I’ve got to make rounds, but I’ll be back tonight. Sit tight, okay?” Sydney stands up.

“Okay, I’ll be good,” Maggie replies with a faux-innocent smile.

Sydney exits the room with a backwards glance and heads down the hallway.

Alex and Zach are walking toward her, flowers and a huge stuffed bear in their hands. She spots Alex whisper something to Zach as he takes the flowers from her and heads to Maggie’s room first.

Alex stops in front of Sydney and appraises her.

“I’m glad you’re taking care of her, Sydney. How’s she doing?”

Sydney adjusts her robes. “She’s recovering well. We’ll be able to discharge her soon.”

“I heard you’ve been visiting her a lot, even with your duties,” Alex says mildly. She looks Sydney in the eye.

“You really love her, don’t you?” 

Sydney freezes. Does Alex know she’s gay? Does she know what had happened between them? What makes her think that she lo-but all the pieces fall into place right then. There’s a reason why Maggie has been on her mind, even after a year apart, no matter how much she tries to push those thoughts down. There’s a reason why she feels warm inside whenever she’s around her, hell, whenever she thinks of her. There’s a reason why when she imagines a future after graduation, Maggie is almost always by her side.

She doesn’t say anything, but it doesn’t look like Alex expects an answer. Alex nods after it’s clear Sydney won’t say anything, or maybe can’t. She gives Sydney’s shoulder a quick squeeze before walking past her and into Maggie’s room.

Sydney speed walks away. Shit and also _fuck_. She glances up quickly. Surely God will forgive her this time, considering the circumstances. She likes to think they’ve patched up their relationship since she came to terms with her sexuality. But Alex has shaken up her world and made her realize something. 

She doesn’t have a lingering crush like she thought she had for almost two years. She’s in love with Maggie.

She’s in love with Maggie, but Maggie’s made it clear that she doesn’t want anything more than friendship. It doesn’t matter at this point whether that’s because she’s not attracted to her anymore or because she’s actually planning on working on herself like she told her. Either way, there’s not much clearer of a rejection than that. Sydney’s lost her chance right as she realizes she even had one.

* * *

“So are you coming back to Hogwarts in September? I heard your internship is ending,” Maggie asks on her discharge day.

Sydney doesn’t look up as she fills out the paperwork. “I’m actually staying for another term. They’re training me in more difficult procedures now. The head Healer might offer me a position as a Trainee if I continue to perform well.”

“A position without having taken N.E.W.T.S.?” Maggie is skeptical.

“They’ve seen what I can do. I guess I’m a special case,” Sydney replies, a proud smile coming her face despite her trying to hide it.

“So you don’t want to come back? Your friends are there...I’m there.” Maggie’s longing voice makes her look up.

“And I love you guys, but…you know how I am. This comes before everything else.” Sydney’s tone may seem hesitant, but Maggie knows it’s final.

She holds out her clipboard. “Sign here, please.”

Maggie takes the clipboard and proffered quill. “You…if you loved us, why didn’t you say goodbye?” her voice wavers despite herself and she looks down so she doesn’t have to see Sydney’s expression as she pretends to read over the parchment.

Sydney sighs. “Maggie…” She runs a hand through her hair. “Look at me.” Maggie looks up with a defiant expression. “I tried to break my ties with everyone so it wouldn’t hurt anyone when I left. It’s easier that way.”

“For you,” Maggie mutters.

Sydney shuts her eyes. “I’m sorry, Maggie. I should have told you.”

Maggie gives her a slow nod. “So I’m not going to see you again? Unless I get sick?” she tries to joke. 

Sydney doesn’t say anything.

Maggie bites her lip. “You know…there’s an elective Healing class I’m taking when school starts again. It’s taught by Lancelot Weasley. He was a Department Head at St. Mungo’s. He’s starting a Healing Club, too.” 

“As tempting as that is, I’m staying to be with my girlfriend, too.” Sydney takes the clipboard back. 

Maggie is shocked but manages to mostly hide her expression. “Oh, you have a girlfriend?”

Sydney nods. “Yes, she works at Gringotts.” 

It’s clear to Maggie that Sydney’s life has veered from hers. She seems all set up with a job, a girlfriend, a path that no longer intersects with Maggie’s own. “I’m happy for you, Syd,” Maggie replies with a slightly pained smile.

A heavy silence hangs between them.

Maggie takes a deep breath in preparation. There’s nothing more to be said. “I’m uh, I’m going to go now. I know you’re not the type to keep in touch, so…I hope everything works out for you. You really deserve the best,” she finishes, echoing the conversation they had long ago in Greenhouse 4. That was back when Sydney was closeted, insecure in her identity, but brilliant at her studies. Now Sydney doesn’t seem to be scared of anything anymore. Maggie had feelings for that assertive yet vulnerable girl, and those feelings…well, they’re still simmering for who she is now, too. Even if she had shut down any potential _something_ they could have had five days ago. She has to keep telling herself it’s for the better.

Sydney nods and swallows, also remembering that day. Looks like this will be goodbye. Probably forever. Sydney’s already said goodbye to their potential relationship before, but this will be goodbye to Maggie as a person, as a friend, as the person she loves. She decides she needs something…something final. Something to mark the end. She needs to take the chance now. No regrets, right? 

She steps forward and kisses Maggie, just for a few seconds, and pulls away. She’s so caught up in committing every sensation to memory that she almost misses how Maggie kisses back.

“Goodbye, Maggie.”

Maggie looks at her with those big, expressive, beautiful brown eyes and smiles for one last second before turning away.

Sydney watches her leave, standing alone in the room. She stays there long after, still looking at the last spot she saw Maggie before she disappeared.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you enjoyed the little reversal. I've also decided that while I love the conversations between the characters in the two, it's pointless and lazy to copy and paste them in this fic. Therefore, some of the dialogue is inspired and similar, but most of it should be new.


	11. Chapter 11

Maggie touches her hand to her lips as she walks out of St. Mungo’s. Her stomach is a pit and she feels like her heart is contracting or dropping or something, but she keeps walking without looking back. She feels them building up, but she won’t let her tears out until she gets somewhere private. She knows she needs time to mourn (again), but she’ll get over Sydney. Maybe she won’t forget about her, and she hopes she won’t, but she has to get over her. For real this time.

She sees Alex, Zach, and Charlie standing outside through the glass windows. She takes a deep breath and exits the hospital.

Alex falls back in line to walk with her.

“You okay?” She asks with a look of concern.

Maggie nods, even though she wants to let her emotions out. “Yeah, I just-“ Alex purses her lips at Maggie’s wavering voice. 

“What happened?” Alex interrupts her and throws an arm over her shoulder. “I know something was going on between you and Sydney during fifth year.”

Maggie lets out a watery chuckle. “We said goodbye. She kissed me. I don’t know.”

“I could tell she really likes you, Mags. Why didn’t you guys ever…”

“She was scared, then I shut her down. We just never got the timing right. And now I’ll never see her again.” Maggie looks up at the sky and presses her quivering lips together.

“Maybe you won’t, or maybe you will. You never know.” Alex hugs her.

“And remember your tea leaves in Divination third year? You had the sun and a big old heart! You have a great love in the future! Just keep holding on!”

Maggie nods and decides not to cry right now after all. 

“You’re right. I have so much ahead of me. There’s no need to get caught up on one girl.”

* * *

Maggie spends a lot of the summer with herself. By choice, of course. She’s never liked being alone with her mind, but she needs to uncover what she really wants and who she wants to be. She’s got the basics down: she wants to be a Healer. That’s it, really. 

But what she wants…she wants to be less impulsive and think a little more about her actions before she commits them. She wants to be a better friend and be available for her friends whenever she can. She wants to learn to control her emotions better, but she doesn’t know how yet.

She thinks she may want to date with the intention of having a long-term romantic relationship. She sees Alex and Charlie and envies what they have sometimes, but she wonders if she would miss the fun she has with other people. She’s always sought fun and spontaneity with others, not really considering a serious relationship. But Maggie thinks about what she had with Gavin. That was pretty serious, even though she didn’t love him the way he loved her. What she felt for Sydney was the closest she had gotten to what Alex and Charlie have. She thinks she could have loved her, not like she knows what love feels like.

She thinks that she wants that in the future, too. Maggie wants someone who can make her smile with just a look, calm her with a touch, and just enjoy herself around them without wanting anyone else. Maybe she’ll look for that kind of thing when she gets back to Hogwarts.

* * *

Getting over Sydney is so hard. She’s been caught up on her for two years, and Sydney flits through her mind at the most inconvenient moments. She has to look twice at every redheaded girl she passes. She sees Sydney in the strict librarians who check her books out. She thinks of her when she sees lilies and has to leave the area when she does. 

But Maggie spends time with Alex talking through what happened, and goes out with Zach to get ice cream and walk around different cities. Spending time with her friends helps distract her, and Sydney begins to walk through her mind instead of running.

Maggie thinks she’s ready to start going on casual dates a month and a half later, and throws herself into it. She meets a hot guy while she’s building a sandcastle on a beach, and they get seafood together. Nothing happens besides a hot and heavy makeout session, but it’s a start. A cute girl at Flourish and Blotts writes her number onto a bookmark she slides into Maggie’s stack of books, and they get coffee together a few days later. They go on a couple of dates and get a little handsy, but she’s not quite what Maggie’s looking for. Kissing girls is nice, though. She meets a few other guys and girls, but nothing serious becomes of any of their dates. Maggie doesn’t mind, though. Going out with people is fun, and she’s learning about all the sorts of people out there that she can date. It helps her pinpoint the kind of person she wants to be with eventually.

By the end of the summer she thinks about Sydney only sometimes. She knows she’ll probably never meet someone as smart and ambitious as Sydney is, but those aren’t the most important thing about a person, even if they’re extremely attractive traits in Sydney. And Sydney…well she’s not drop dead gorgeous or anything, but there was something in her that drew Maggie in. She was assertive and confident, beautiful without knowing it, but still had those flaws that made her very human and approachable for Maggie. She still doesn’t know if her eyes are brown or green, anything about her family besides their academic orientation, or her favorite animal. But she still wants to know these things. No. She’s let her go. She has to continue letting her go. These questions and others end up in the background of Maggie’s mind, only occasionally floating to the top.

Fall begins and Maggie finds herself distracted by N.E.W.T. classes and Healing Club. Transfiguration becomes so difficult Maggie spends a few hours each day reading up in her textbook and practicing the spells they work on every week. They’re all frazzled by their respective academic weaknesses, but manage to get by with each other’s help. Healing Club is as wonderful and informative as they all expected it to be, and they spend every Tuesday taking notes and practicing basic healing spells. They study during the week, visit Hogsmeade over the weekend, and they’re so damn busy they don’t have time for much else. 

Surprising and distracting, though, are her feelings that emerge for Zach. They sort of came out of nowhere, but it sort of makes sense since they spent so much time alone over the summer. Zach was the one who was able to make her laugh again, and they got to know each other pretty well. Zach’s a wonderfully supportive friend, not to mention smart, tall, and with an attractive boyish charm. Maggie’s always been into that kind of thing in a guy. He’s seeing Dawn, though, and Maggie wouldn’t do anything to jeopardize their relationship. She feels a little heartbroken and it takes a few weeks to get over it, but in the end she’s happy to see him happy. 

He tries to her up with other people and it’s when he points out a redhead that she realizes she hasn’t thought about Sydney in weeks, and it’s not just because she was distracted by her feelings for Zach. She smiles to herself.

Everything’s okay, though, even with the stress and pain and everything. December arrives and Maggie steps on the Hogwarts Express to go home for break with a fresh foot and a new outlook. She’s ready for what the world wants to bring to her. Maybe she’ll fall in love, maybe she won’t. But whatever happens, she’s ready.


	12. Chapter 12

A rosy tint arises on Maggie’s cheeks as she walks from the bus stop back home. The rolling of her suitcase on the pavement follows her as she smiles politely to people who move out of her way so she doesn’t hit them. _221, 222, ah!_ She reaches her house after ten minutes of walking and takes her hand off the handle of her suitcase to reach for her keys. She rummages around in her coat pocket until her fingers touch metal. Maggie unlocks the gate and rolls her suitcase to the door. 

Before she can insert her key into the lock, the door opens and her mom emerges, wrapped in a blanket. 

“Maggie, come in!” She grabs Maggie’s suitcase and ushers her inside. 

Maggie breathes in deeply, the familiar scents of her house filling her with nostalgia. It’s good to be home.

* * *

“So how’s school going?” Maggie’s mom asks as they sit at the dinner table. They’re eating potatoes, rice, and broccoli today.

Maggie takes a sip of water. “Good, everything’s good.”

Her mom nods. “And how’s Healing Club? Do you think it’s preparing you for applications?”

“Yeah, it’s great! I’m getting a lot out of it.” Maggie spears a potato with her fork and puts it in her mouth.

“That’s good to hear. How are your friends? Do they still all want to become Healers?” Maggie’s mom has always been a straight to the point conversationalist.

“Yup. They’re all the same as ever. Alex and Charlie have occasional relationship drama, Zach is softening Dawn up, everyone’s studying like crazy for N.E.W.T.S.”

“And you’re not dating anyone?” Maggie’s mom looks at her inquisitively. 

“Nope.”

She lets that go with not much more than a pause, but follows with, “Whatever happened to your friend Sydney? You used to talk about her all the time.”

“That was a year and a half ago, Mom! We don’t keep in touch, remember? Who knows, she’s probably a Trainee Healer at this point.”

Maggie’s mom stacks her silverware on her plate. “Oh, that’s right. I remember now. That’s a shame. You two had such a great friendship.”

Maggie shrugs. “People grow apart.”

“Very true.”

* * *

Maggie lives in the suburbs, so there’s not much to do with all the free time she has. She practices her spells every day, but her mom doesn’t let her brew potions in the house, no matter how much she argues that she’ll fall behind. She gives in when her mom tells her to take a deep breath and try to enjoy her vacation. She runs errands, does a few chores, goes to the library to study and check out books, and goes grocery shopping every day. It’s a bit monotonous, sure, but it’s better than staying in the high-stress environment at Hogwarts. 

She carries a stack of six books in her arms and drops them heavily on the library counter to check out. The assistant raises an eyebrow, but smiles. 

“The grind never stops, huh?”

“Nope!” Maggie smiles back. 

She’s been at the library every day for a week now, and the assistant-Jane-has checked her books out almost every day. Maggie knows the girl’s into her…Maggie’s caught Jane sneaking covert glances at her, not like she hasn’t been doing the same. It’s been a while since Maggie’s felt more than a mild attraction to someone, and she wonders where this will go. Jane’s taller than her by a few inches, her long brown hair shines even under the harsh fluorescent lights, and her blue eyes are a dark shade Maggie’s never seen before. All in all, she’s very attractive.

Jane stacks Maggie’s books neatly after she scans them. 

“You’re really into plants, huh?” She looks at Maggie through her lashes.

Maggie gives a nervous chuckle. “Yeah, I’ve always loved them. I’m really interested in their medicinal uses, too.”

Jane smirks at her. “Are you, now?”

Maggie raises her hands. “Oh, no- _no_ , not like that-“

Jane laughs. “I’m joking, Maggie.” She holds out Maggie’s receipt. “You’re cute,” she finishes with a smile.

Maggie feels her heart flutter. “…thanks.” She doesn’t know what to say so she reaches out for the receipt. Their hands brush and she takes the receipt back quickly. Her fingers tingle where they made contact. Jane’s dark blue eyes meet her own.

“Hey, do you want to get coffee sometime?” Maggie can’t help but admire how forward Jane is.

“I would love to.”

* * *

Maggie learns a lot about Jane over the dates they have over the next week. She’s a university student who wants to become a medical doctor, she volunteers at the library over school breaks since she loves books that much, and she drinks her coffee black without sugar or milk. Jane is pretty damn intelligent, she plays tennis, and she’s very forward about her intentions.

It’s refreshing to talk to someone who’s clear about what they want, and Maggie finds herself unable to sleep some nights because she’s thinking about Jane and what she wants with her.

Jane kisses her after their second date and Maggie learns she’s pretty good at that, too.

“I’ve never really dated a girl,” Maggie brings up as they watch the stars in a park. Maggie’s laying with her head on Jane’s stomach, and Jane’s arms are wrapped around her shoulders.

“Hmm?” Jane shifts a little.

“I don’t really know what to do. I mean I’ve gone on dates with girls, but I’ve never _dated_ one.”

“I don’t think it should be any different from dating guys. If anything, it’s better.” Jane laughs and Maggie admires how firm her stomach is.

“It’s pretty nice,” Maggie sighs out.

They’ve been dating for two weeks and it’s wonderful. Jane can challenge Maggie not just intellectually, but in other ways, too. She makes her think about how she sees the world and introduces her to philosophy and even poetry.

“Why did you want to become a doctor?” Maggie asks her while they hold hands, walking down the street past midnight. She’s a little tired, but being with Jane energizes her.

“I really like helping people. And it’s a job where you can learn new things all the time. Being able to see innovative procedures, to be challenged every day, it’s kind of addictive, you know?”

Maggie freezes. That sounds very similar to what Sydney had told her once. 

“Babe? What’s wrong?” Jane turns to her. She brushes Maggie’s bangs to the side.

Maggie gives her a pained smile. “Nothing. You just reminded me of someone for a second.”

“An ex.” It’s a statement, not a question.

Maggie shakes her head. “No, not an ex. We never dated.”

Jane lets go of her hand. “But you wanted to.” She’s very perceptive, which Maggie usually likes.

“Yeah, but it didn’t work out. That was two years ago, anyway.” Maggie reaches for her hand and laces Jane’s fingers with hers. They continue to walk down the street, headed toward Maggie’s house.

“What was she like?” Jane swings their arms, making Maggie laugh.

“Kind of like you. Assertive, smart. She’s training to be a doctor right now.” It’s surprising that Maggie can still hurt a little to think about Sydney again. It’s not very painful; it’s just an itch she could never properly scratch.

“Do you not talk anymore?” Jane shivers a little and Maggie rubs her back.

“No, she moved. She’s not the type to keep in touch.” Maggie kicks at the snow.

“That sucks. That’s kind of dickish.”

Maggie frowns. “It’s just the type of person she is. She’s very single-minded.”

“It’s never good to devote all your time to just one thing. Diversity is key!” Jane exclaims.

“Can’t argue with that.”

They reach Maggie’s house in another five minutes. Maggie thinks she can feel the heat of Jane’s hand through their gloves even though it’s freezing outside.

“Do you want to come in? Warm up a little?” Maggie bites her lip. Her mom’s out of town for a few days for work and she has the house to herself.

Jane smiles.

* * *

Maggie’s not sure if what they have is serious. The past four weeks with Jane have been great, but she has her doubts about where they will go after break ends. She’s held herself back because of this. They’re both very oriented toward their respective paths, and Jane doesn’t know she’s a witch. She’s never had to deal with “coming out” to a Muggle before, and she doesn’t know when or if she should. Electronics don’t work at Hogwarts, so she can’t use her phone or even email Jane come January. How do you continue a relationship like that? She can’t just tell Jane to send her letters in the mail. That would be too unusual. She should have thought about the minutiae of dating a Muggle before she jumped into it. 

“I think we should break up,” Maggie says shakily as she sits in her room. Jane pulls her shirt on and sits on the bed next to her.

“I know,” she replies with a sigh. She puts a hand on Maggie’s thigh.

Maggie looks up at her, questioning.

“We can’t make this work. We live an ocean away from each other. We’re going to different med schools. It’s just not feasible.” Jane talks to her hand that’s on Maggie’s thigh the whole time.

Maggie puts her hand on top of Jane’s. “I really like you. But…yeah…”

Jane finally looks at her. “I really like you, too.” She gives her a watery smile. “And I’m going to remember this with fondness, not with sadness.” She stands up. “I’m going to go now.”

Maggie stands up, too. “Let me walk you out.”

“A gentlelady, huh?” That stabs at Maggie’s heart but she doesn’t let it show.

Jane heads out of Maggie’s room with Maggie following closely behind. They stay silent as they reach the front door.

“I guess, uh, good luck with everything,” Maggie says. 

“Yeah, you too.” Jane smiles and leans in for a final kiss. They pull apart, smile once more, and Jane leaves.

Maggie closes and locks the door behind her. She’s glad she stayed reserved in their relationship because she knows it would have really hurt if she had let herself fall for Jane.

* * *

Maggie thinks about Jane throughout the next few days, and especially at night, but she makes peace with what happened quickly. They had an amicable breakup, and they had a lot of fun while they were together. There’s really nothing to be sad about. It was a winter fling, she supposes.

“So she left just like that?” Alex looks incredulous through the laptop.

“Yeah, we were on the same page,” Maggie replies. She’s a little sad, but she’s not heartbroken or anything. She’ll have to get used to the lack of companionship, but thankfully the next term is starting in a few days.

“That’s not too bad, I guess,” Alex murmurs thoughtfully. “It’s amazing that we can talk to each other through these boxes, Mags!” She practically vibrates in her seat. “Muggles come up with truly amazing things.”

Maggie rolls her eyes. “At least now I can say I dated a girl, I guess.”

“Ooh, what was it like compared to dating guys?” Alex leans in.

“It was good. Less complicated.” 

“That’s it?!”

“I guess it depends on the person overall. She was easy to date because she was clear about what she wanted. No games, no hesitation, or anything.”

“But guys are like that!”

“No, guys are pushy and insensitive sometimes. This was a really nice change.”

“Well I’m happy you got that experience, Mags. What’s next?”

Maggie laughs. “Who knows, maybe I’ll date another girl!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Y'all aren't ready for the next chapter. I'm very excited.


	13. Chapter 13

Maggie stretches her arms over her head and yawns mostly silently, not wanting to awaken her dormmates. She ties her hair into a loose bun and heads toward the showers. It’s the first day of her last semester at Hogwarts, and she wants to start the day right. She’s going to have a nice, long shower, then she’s going to eat a great breakfast, and then head onto class. She hums a quiet tune as she walks past the plants that grow all around the Common Room.

Her shower is just as leisurely as she hoped, and she heads to breakfast smelling like soap.

“Wow, you’re the first one at the table!” Zach remarks when he shows up. 

“I just feel like it’s going to be a good day,” Maggie replies as she butters a slice of bread. The sun shines into the Great Hall, the sky reflected above them is nice and blue, and she’s in a great mood. 

Alex and Charlie arrive a few minutes later and mention Maggie’s timeliness as well. 

“Are you ready for our last semester? Everything’s going to change so much!” Alex is excited, but worried at the same time. Charlie grabs her hand and smiles.

“We have N.E.W.T.S. to worry about first,” he warns.

Everyone groans at that.

“Well, we can all help each other out,” Zach says. “Maggie’s good at Herbology and Potions, I’ve got Transfiguration, Alex is the master of Charms, and Charlie’s got Defense Against the Dark Arts covered. We can tutor each other!” 

They all nod thoughtfully at that. 

“Who’s going to Healing Club tomorrow night, by the way? I heard there’s some hotshot teacher or something joining,” Alex mentions.

Maggie frowns. “Where did you hear that?” 

“I heard some Slytherins talking about it on the way here. They weren’t very happy, though.” Alex rests her chin on her palm.

“Must be a Gryffindor,” Charlie surmises. They all nod thoughtfully.

They break soon after to head to Charms. The good thing about having a friend group of future Healers is that they all have their N.E.W.T.-level classes together. 

Maggie smiles as she walks down the hallway. She doesn’t know why, but she feels almost giddy as they walk to class. The upcoming N.E.W.T.S. should loom over her, but she’s excited to prove her knowledge. She’s been working so hard; she’s the best at Potions and she still goes to the greenhouses every week to visit the plants. She may be weaker at Defense Against the Dark Arts, but she’s got time to prepare for that, too. If she could manage to go from average to almost top in the class at Transfiguration, she’s sure she can work just as hard at Defense Against the Dark Arts as well. 

Charms goes smoothly and they separate during their pre-lunch break. Zach and Charlie depart to nap (the girls roll their eyes at this) so Maggie and Alex catch up with Shahir at the library. He greets them with a cordial “hello” before launching into a rumor he heard about Potions.

“Apparently Slughorn is pairing us up by ability. He doesn’t want anyone to hold each other back.” He narrows his eyes as he peers at them suspiciously. 

Alex rolls her eyes in response. “We’re not going to hold you back, Shahir.”

“I wasn’t going to say that.”

“You know Maggie’s the best at Potions, anyway.” Alex puts her elbows on the table and leans over to emphasize her point. Maggie rubs her shoulder and looks away.

Shahir’s about to respond when Madame Pince suddenly appears and shushes them, her expression pointed and wild.

They duck their heads into their textbooks and read completely silently for the rest of the period.

Lunch finds Maggie sipping lemonade as she sits with a ham sandwich. Zach had grimaced when she had taken it apart to butter the bread (her bread needs butter, okay?), but she had smirked at him, wagging her eyebrows until he looked away. 

“I’m so happy we have another break after this,” Zach says happily. 

“Don’t tell me you’re taking another nap!” Alex exclaims.

“I’m a growing boy!” 

“Not again,” Maggie groans.

“Almost a man this time, Mags. Only fifteen days left!” Zach puffs out his chest.

“It’s really not that exciting,” Charlie mutters. He’s already seventeen and it doesn’t feel any different.

“You can Apparate! That’s something!” Alex pats his thigh as the rest of them nod vigorously. 

Charlie smiles at this. “That’s true.”

Maggie takes a walk alone outside after lunch. It’s still wonderfully bright and sunny as she strolls along with her hands inside her pockets. In half a year she will be training to be a Healer. She wonders what her life will be like then. She hopes her friends will be close, but traveling by magic makes distance not much of an issue. Maybe she’ll live with Alex in an apartment, maybe she’ll find a cute guy or girl to date, maybe she’ll have a great time training at whatever hospital she ends up in. She knows she should enjoy the time she has left at Hogwarts as much as she can, but she’s ready to take the next step as well. She inhales deeply and breathes in the fresh air. She checks her watch. Twenty minutes until Potions. Time to head back.

She walks the familiar path to Potions feeling excited. Most people hate the dank, dimly lit corridor in the dungeons, but it feels like home to her. Professor Slughorn greets her at the door. “Front and center, please, Ms. Lin,” he says kindly as he shakes her hand.

Maggie’s not surprised he places her at the table with the most attention, but she still feels a sense of pride for his recognition of her Potions prowess.

The table in the center at the front is empty when she arrives. She carefully places her bag on the floor and takes out her textbook. _I wonder who my partner will be this time,_ she wonders. Slughorn’s really mixing it up their last semester. In the three previous they were allowed to choose their partners. She hopes she gets Alex. Even Shahir wouldn’t be too bad.

The rest of the class slowly fills in as Maggie unpacks her Potions kit. The screeches of wooden stools against the concrete, dry coughs, and bags being set on the floor with various degrees of force meet her ears.

She hears steps behind her and pays only half attention as she reads her textbook. What kind of potion is Slughorn going to make them brew today? The steps slow behind her and seem almost hesitant. Maggie notices a chalkboard flipped around to the back by Slughorn’s desk. Maybe she can peer at it to get ahead? No, she has to be patient. She fiddles with her hair and taps on the desk. Hopefully her partner will arrive soon so they can start. The person she has barely registered starts walking again with slow, measured steps. They reach the right side of the table where the open seat is.

“Hey, Maggie.” A hauntingly familiar voice greets her.

Maggie jerks her head out of her textbook so fast she’ll be surprised if she doesn’t get whiplash. But the voice belonging to a person she thought she would never see again has reached her ears once more.

All of the sunny, good day vibes that had been coursing through her disappear immediately as she feels ice run through her veins and hears her heartbeat pounding in her ears. She looks up, eyes wide with disbelief.

Sydney Katz in all her redheaded glory is back in her life.

_Fuck._


	14. Chapter 14

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's the chapter I was the most excited about showing you guys. I hope you like it!

_Fuck, fuck fuck, fuck, FUCK!!!_ races around Maggie’s mind as Sydney smiles softly at her. She smiles back and is thankful her brain can run on autopilot while her mind goes insane. Or did it shut down? Doesn’t matter in this case.

Sydney turns away for a second to put down her bag. “How have you been?” she asks as if there’s no tension between them.

Maggie’s stuck marveling at Sydney’s appearance even while her train of “fuck”s continues in the back of her mind. She’s back in Hogwarts robes and her Slytherin tie is as neat as she’s ever seen it; it really brings out the color of her eyes. Even more so, her hair is gorgeously cut, even more gorgeous than last time and _why is Maggie checking her out right now?!_

She shakes her head and blinks in rapid succession. “Did you ask me something?” She ignores the rushed tones behind her that sound suspiciously like Alex and Zach.

Sydney laughs lightly and her eyes are _so fucking bright and beautiful!_ “I asked how you’ve been.”

“Oh, good. Fine.” Maggie says this so quickly she kicks herself mentally. Why can’t she be cool and collected? “Why are you here?” The words come out of her mouth before she even knows it.

Sydney exhales and nods once. “My sister is a first year. She just got sorted since she was sick last semester. My parents wanted me to come back to help her get acclimated.” 

Maggie lifts both her eyebrows. “I didn’t know you have a sister.”

Sydney opens her mouth to reply, but Professor Slughorn chooses that moment to walk to the front of the class and begin lecture. 

“Welcome, everyone, and a very special welcome to Sydney Katz!” He loftily extends a hand, palm up, in her direction. Maggie didn’t miss this part of Professor Slughorn. “She’s a very talented young lady who’s slated to be a Healer at St. Mungo’s, count on that!” 

Sydney flushes and stares at Professor Slughorn with wide eyes, not knowing what to do. Slughorn continues on, introducing the class to what they’ll be covering this semester. 

“Now, as you might have noticed, I’ve paired you with a partner this semester. They will be of similar ability to you so you can grow together!” He smiles broadly at them and doesn’t seem discouraged when they look blankly back at him.

“Now,” he continues with a flourish, “you will be brewing a very special potion today! Who’s familiar with Amortentia?”

Two-thirds of the class raises their hands. 

Slughorn claps his beefy hands together. “Wonderful, wonderful. For those of you who don’t know, Amortentia is the most powerful love potion in the world.” He bends down to make eye contact with Maggie, his smile making the points of his moustache twirl upwards. “Ms. Lin, you spend a lot of time in the greenhouses.” (Sydney shifts beside her.) “What flower imitates the aroma given off by Amortentia?”

“Olomoroses,” Maggie whispers. 

“That’s right! Ten points to Hufflepuff! Now, everyone, flip to page fifty-three and get started! I expect to smell crystalized pineapple coming from everyone’s cauldrons by the end of the class period!” He walks to the chalkboard and flips it over, revealing the ingredients.

Sydney robotically takes out her Potions kit as Maggie similarly unpacks the ingredients she needs. They both remember what had transpired a year and a half ago with olomoroses. 

They work separately in an extremely awkward silence with their backs almost turned to each other. Both of their cheeks are flushed, and sweat drips down Maggie’s face; she has to take special care to make sure none of it drips into her cauldron.

Slughorn walks past them a few times and pulls on his moustache. The two girls at the front table in the middle aren’t interacting at all. He thought Ms. Katz and Ms. Lin would make a good pair since they’re both very talented, but perhaps he was mistaken. Ms. Katz isn’t much of a team player, anyway. 

An hour passes and a citrus and a delicate rose scent spirals up from Sydney’s cauldron, indicating that her potion is finished. She steps back and crosses her arms, waiting for Slughorn’s approval so she can leave. She doesn’t need to smell her Amortentia anymore, anyway. Not when the real thing bearing that scent is just a few feet away. 

She shoots glances out of the corner of her eye at Maggie. She’s grown even more beautiful, maturing from cute and pretty to breathtaking and gorgeous since two years ago when they had first met. (Maybe Sydney’s perception is skewed because she’s head over heels in love with her, though.) She’s grown out her hair, and it suits her more than the short hair with the dye job she had before. Maggie seems more mature now, too. She works with a calmer air and doesn’t freak out like she used to when she thought she made a mistake. Sydney probably loved Maggie back in their fifth year, but she knows for certain that she loves this more mature Maggie. Well, whatever Maggie becomes, she’ll probably love her too. Sydney runs a hand through her hair. One thing at a time. 

Maggie turns her nose as far as she can from her cauldron and its steam while Slughorn approaches Sydney’s. She has no desire to smell whatever comes out of there. She’s not sure if it’ll be the same as last time-well, the time with the flowers, that is-but she doesn’t want to find out. She’s already on this straight path to become a Healer and she doesn’t need Sydney to distract her anymore, no matter how gorgeous she is or how ready she seems to reconnect.

Slughorn finishes praising Sydney’s potion in front of the whole class and moves on to Maggie’s. “Now let’s see what you have for us, Ms. Lin.” He bends down, straining the bottom buttons on his jacket, and inhales deeply. “Ah, very nice. You’re very close! You may want to collaborate with Ms. Katz next class!” He winks at her.

Maggie fractionally narrows her eyes before she feels an itch in her nose. She sniffles a few times before turning away to sneeze into her elbow. “Atchoo!” 

“Gesundheit!” Sydney exclaims automatically.

“Thanks.” Maggie vanishes her potion and begins packing her bag, pointedly ignoring Sydney’s attempts to make eye contact with her.

She rushes away from the classroom trying to push down the fact swimming at the top of her mind: she had inhaled quickly at the beginning of her sneeze, and some of the steam from her potion had reached her. It smelled like vanilla.

* * *

Her potion must have been brewed wrong. Slughorn himself said it wasn’t exactly correct! That must explain why she’s smelling vanilla again. She knows she’s not in love with Sydney. Hell, she’s never even been in love before! All she feels for the other girl is confusion, hesitance, and maybe a slight attraction. But not love!

Maggie heads to dinner after dropping her bag off in her dorm. The rest of the group is already there, and they’re in a heated discussion.

“She’s sitting alone!”

“It’s not a good idea.”

“Were they-“

Everyone quiets as Maggie approaches with her back facing the Slytherin table. “What are you talking about?”

“Quidditch.” “N.E.W.T.S.,” Zach and Charlie say at the same time. They glare at each other.

“You are terrible liars.” Maggie sits heavily on the bench with a huff.

“Fine. We’re thinking of asking Sydney to sit with us like old times since she’s sitting alone.” Zach informs her. He raises a brow. “Unless that’s not okay with you?”

Maggie sighs. “No, that’s fine.” She suddenly looks suspicious. “Why do you think that would bother me?”

Zach pales a bit. “I mean, after she left us all without saying goodbye-and especially to you-I thought…”

Maggie waves a hand. “No, go ahead. I feel bad for her, anyway. It’s like fifth year all over again.”

Zach waves at Sydney from a distance and beckons for her to join them.

Maggie tenses her shoulders. The only free spot is of course next to her. 

“Hi, everyone,” Sydney greets with some hesitation. She really didn’t leave them on a great note. Or any note at all.

A chorus of “hi”s answers her. She grabs an orange and starts to peel it while the conversation starts around them again.

Alex leans in. “So, Sydney…how’s everything going? Are you still seeing that girl from Gringotts?”

Maggie widens her eyes and makes pointed eye contact with Alex, who just as pointedly ignores her. She really doesn’t want Sydney to know how much she’s told Alex about her, but that appears to be a fruitless endeavor now. 

Sydney finishes peeling her orange and wipes her hands on a napkin. “No, we broke up a while ago. I came back for M-my sister.” She discretely looks around and breathes an inward sigh of relief. No one caught her near lapse.

Alex reaches out to pat her hand across the table while Maggie continues to glare at her. “I’m sorry to hear that.”

Sydney shrugs a shoulder. “It just wasn’t meant to be.” And with that she begins to separate the slices of her orange.

Maggie decides to shove aside her confusion and anger and everything. If she’s going to sit next to Sydney for the rest of the semester, she’d better put those emotions aside starting now. “So, what are your next steps after N.E.W.T.S.?”

“Well, I was supposed to be a Trainee Healer starting this semester, but I’m here for my sister. They have a position saved for me after we graduate,” Sydney replies matter of factly.

The table gawks. “Wow!” “That’s amazing!” “Nice one!”

“I’m happy for you,” Maggie manages to smile this time, her first genuine smile since Sydney has returned.

Sydney is surprised for a second but smiles back.

Zach notices from the background what’s going on. He clears his throat loudly after gathering a heaping pile of food into a bowl. “I’m going to go…study.” He looks at Alex and Charlie, who stand up quickly.

“Yeah, we’re going to-“ Charlie points a thumb over his shoulder.

“We have-“ Alex picks up her bag.

“Bye!” The three leave with haste, leaving Maggie and Sydney alone.

They’re left blinking in surprise at how fast they managed to depart.

“Wow.”

“That was…”

“Yeah.”

Maggie turns to the side to face Sydney so she’s straddling the bench. Sydney’s waving at her sister who’s sitting with a few kids from the Ravenclaw table, then gives Maggie her full attention.

“So, what have you been up to?” Sydney smiles at her fondly, and Maggie feels like no time has passed. It’s as if she’s in fifth year again, hanging out with Sydney like it’s the good old days.

“Oh, nothing much. We go to Healing Club every week. Apparently there’s some new teacher-“ Maggie breaks off when she notices the flush crawling up Sydney’s cheeks. “Aaand it’s you, isn’t it?”

Sydney twists her mouth to the side. “Yup. St. Mungo’s wants me to scope out the seventh years interested in becoming Healers.”

“Great. Well, uh, anyway, I don’t know. I’m doing well. Everything’s good.” Maggie scratches the back of her head.

“That’s good to hear.” Sydney nods a few times, absently thinking about what to say. “I’ve missed you, Maggie.” She reaches out towards Maggie’s hand, carefully watching her facial expression in case she’s not okay with this. She places her hand on top of the other girl’s. 

Maggie wills herself to keep her breathing steady. This is completely normal for friends. “Do you-uh-do you want to take a walk? Catch up a little?”

Sydney removes her hand quickly with a hopeful smile. “Sure.”

* * *

“I’m sorry I’m acting so weird,” Maggie starts. They’ve been walking for five minutes and cycling through random topics. They’ve talked about the weather, Hogwarts’ architecture, and anything else that will fill the gaps. “I just never expected to see you again.”

“You pushed me out of your mind, right?” Sydney smiles in understanding.

Maggie stops walking for a second. “Yes, exactly. I’m still getting used to having you around again.” She steps forward again.

“Well, you’ll see me in Potions! And Healing Club,” Sydney adds as an afterthought.

“So, are you like spying for St. Mungo’s? Deciding who makes it in and all that?” They round a corner and start walking up a tower.

“No, nothing like that. I just give…recommendations if they ask once they see your application.” Sydney rubs her arm.

“Ah, I see. So I should start sucking up to you, right?” Maggie smirks. “Brownie points? I can bake you literal brownies for them! Alex has said many times I’m a great baker.”

Sydney laughs and briefly touches Maggie’s arm. “That won’t be necessary. I’m sure you’ll be such a competitive applicant they won’t have to ask me anything.”

Maggie ducks her head. “Thanks,” she whispers, almost bashful. She bites her lip.

“You’re very talented, Maggie, and very compassionate. I know you’ll make a great Healer.” 

They reach the top of the tower. Sydney walks up to the window and places her arms on the sill. 

“It’s so beautiful out there. I didn’t think I would, but I’ve missed this place.”

Maggie walks up after her and watches Sydney from the side. She’s not going to be cliché and say something like “yes it is” while she’s looking at her, but…Sydney’s looking up at the stars with a look of awe on her face. She’s always so curious about everything, it’s like her brain never stops. Maggie’s always admired that about her. And this place, with just the two of them bathed in moonlight…it’s very romantic.

“What happened between you and your girlfriend?” Maggie asks. It’s perhaps not tactful, but this is the sort of thing friends share. She rests her arms on the windowsill as well. They’re side by side, staring up at the twinkling stars.

“Well, we wanted different things. She was great, but she wanted a serious relationship and I wanted…” Sydney pauses. _You._ “I couldn’t be faithful to her. I’ll put it like that.”

Maggie looks astonished and she turns to face her. “Sydney Katz! You cheated?!”

Sydney’s eyebrows fly up as her expression turns from reluctance to outrage. “No! I would never cheat! You know me better than that!” She pauses as they both think back to when they kissed while she was dating Herschel. Did that count as cheating if it was a sham relationship? “I couldn’t stay emotionally faithful to her.”

“Oh.” Maggie breathes in, understanding. “Well, I’m sorry. For both of you.”

Sydney stays silent for a moment. “It was months ago. Nothing for you to feel sorry about.”

“So the other girl. The one you had feelings for. Whatever happened with her?” Maggie presses on, not knowing if she wants to hear the rest.

“Nothing ever happened with her.” Sydney turns away quickly and points at a constellation. “You see those stars that form a box? That’s the body of Ursa Major.”

Maggie looks to where Sydney’s pointing. “I don’t-“ she shifts a little. “Oh, I see it now!”

Sydney smiles with satisfaction.

“What don’t you know?” Sydney always finds something new to impress her with.

“A good number of things, silly.”

“Now that’s just you being humble.” Maggie bobs her head up and down. “Sit down, be humble.”

The redhead tilts her head in confusion. “What?”

“Nothing.”

* * *

They walk down together half an hour later in cheery spirits.

“So it’s your turn to share now. Have you given that big old Maggie heart away?” Sydney asks with a carefully light air.

“No, I’ve been too focused on my studies. I mean I thought I was into Zach for a hot second, but that didn’t work out.” Maggie doesn’t miss Sydney’s perplexed expression. “What? We have a similar sense of humor! And he’s hot!” Sydney grimaces. “But he’s dating Dawn. We wouldn’t have lasted, anyway. Too similar.”

They turn right, heading toward the center of the castle again. 

“Let me walk you to your Common Room,” Sydney offers.

“Ever the gentlewoman.” They both smile.

“Oh, there was this girl, Bree, in September. She didn’t hide that she was into me but-“ Sydney wonders if that’s a jab at her. But Maggie wouldn’t, right? “-that would have been messed up. Also a girl in December but we broke up as friends and that wasn’t serious. Nope, no romance for me. Just studies.”

Sydney feels her heart warm. So Maggie’s single. Her heart races as they draw close to the Hufflepuff Common Room. She has to make a decision.

Maggie stops walking as they approach a nook close to the Common Room. Sydney stops, too, standing a few feet across from her. “Thanks for walking me back, Syd. I…I really enjoyed catching up with you. D-do you want to go to the greenhouses before Healing club tomorrow? Just like old times?” Maggie’s nervous, as Sydney can tell by her lip biting. 

This must be Maggie trying to give her a chance to get back into her life. But she wants more than just that. She can’t hold back anymore. Sydney takes a deep breath. “There’s something I need to tell you. I thought it could wait, but it can’t, so just-listen.”

Maggie’s confused but she nods.

“The reason why I broke up with my girlfriend is you. After we said goodbye at the hospital…I thought about you every day. She could tell I was distracted and I couldn’t give all of myself to her. I just…I still have feelings for you. And I want to know if we can be something. For real this time.” Sydney fiddles with her fingers the entire time, but she manages to get it all out. 

Maggie can’t say a thing. The corridor around them seems hazy and pressing in on her and she can’t seem to focus on Sydney all the way. She feels her heartbeat in her throat and tries to swallow but she can’t. All she can do is give a smile that looks kind of like a grimace.

Sydney soldiers on. “I know this is coming out of nowhere, so take as much time as you need to think about it. I just couldn’t not tell you, not again.” She smiles and leans in. Maggie stays stock still, still trying to process what’s going on. She feels the brush of Sydney’s lips on her cheek before the other girl and her warmth pull away. 

Sydney’s breathing quickly but has a look of exhilaration on her face. “I’ll see you tomorrow.”

Maggie chokes out some sort of affirmation and gives her another smile with her brain working on autopilot once again. Sydney turns around and leaves with a backwards smile. Maggie lets her knees give out and sits in the nook long after Sydney’s gone. She buries her head in her hands.

“Oh, hell.”


	15. Chapter 15

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's the song that strongly influenced this chapter. I would highly recommend giving it a listen and checking out the lyrics. This is how Sydney feels when she thinks of Maggie. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sLIE5DcSMh4

Sydney lies on her bed in the Slytherin dorm. She’s on the topmost floor as a seventh year, and her roommates are familiar to her; there’s the girl who incessantly snores, there’s the girl who’s always working on her assignments at the last minute, there’s the girl who stays as still as a corpse while asleep, and there’s the girl who always brings boys over without consideration of her roommates. All these girls have their idiosyncrasies that usually fascinate her, but there’s only one girl Sydney’s thinking about tonight.

It had been half a year since she had seen Maggie and she swears her heart stopped when she glimpsed even just the back of her head as she walked into Potions earlier that day. From the second she stepped onto the Hogwarts grounds Sydney thought she was prepared to see Maggie again and tell her how she felt immediately. She had it all planned out: she would burst into whatever room Maggie was in, drag her to someplace quiet, and just let it all out. She couldn’t have been more wrong, though. Walking to the empty seat next to Maggie was one of the most difficult things she’s ever done. She could feel hear heart pound like it was going to burst out of her chest, her breathing felt compressed, and she couldn’t do much more than approach her slowly, each footfall feeling like there was a twenty-pound weight strapped to each leg. All of her bravado had disappeared immediately, but she felt excited and terrified at the same time.

She had been thinking of the moment she would see her again ever since Maggie had said goodbye to her at the hospital and kissed her back. They both knew in that moment that whatever they had would never truly be gone, even if they had gone their separate ways. Alex had pointed out to her a few days before that she was in love with Maggie, and well…she was right. But at that point there was no conceivable way they would find their way back to each other again. Sydney was shooting up into the Healer world and Maggie was going back to school.

It was December when her mother had sent an owl with a letter informing her that her little sister was entering Hogwarts in January. Sydney had gone to her superiors the next morning to inform them that she would like to take a semester’s absence to assist in her sister’s transition. They had commended what a good sister she was, and assured her that they would hold a Trainee Healer position for her once seventh year ended. They would have preferred her to start in January, but they understood how important family was and figured Sydney taking the N.E.W.T.S. would be worth the short delay. Sydney thought the timing was perfect. She could go back to Hogwarts to help her sister of course, but she could finally see Maggie again and confess what she had hiding for two and a half years. It was all perfect.

Sydney takes a deep breath and closes her eyes. Her thoughts are always hopeful when she thinks of Maggie. Fearful, yes, but overwhelmingly hopeful as well. When she’s agitated she thinks of Maggie’s smile and calms down. When she’s worried she thinks of what Maggie would say; perhaps “take it one day at a time, Syd,” or even something as simple as “take a deep breath” and she’ll feel better in a few seconds. Maggie just has that effect on her. She feels sunshine and warmth when Maggie crosses her mind, even if she feels a stab in her heart at the same time. Her longing is so strong that she felt almost pulled by the center of her chest toward Hogwarts while she was working at St. Mungo’s. It’s like there’s a string attached to her heart and the other side is wherever Maggie is. Its length was short when she was at Hogwarts for one year, first attaching itself then pulling her toward Maggie. Even when she tried to cut it off with her sharpest mental scissors she didn’t make a scratch. After all that distance when the connection was weak-but never gone-she’s back now. She’s back now and the pull she feels is stronger than ever.

She fantasizes all the time about being with Maggie. She lets the good times drift into her mind as the sounds of her dormmates moving about quiets down. Breakfast with Maggie as they compete to see who can stuff the most grapes in their mouths (Maggie always won), taking care of the plants together as they shared their favorite novels and songs, watching Quidditch games together and ending up watching Maggie jump up and down and scream more than she watched the actual game; she misses it all. But she wants more than that this time around. She sees them traveling the world together, maybe visiting museums and aquariums and having coffee in little shops. She sees herself buying flowers for her and Maggie smiling broadly as she opens her arms for an embrace. She sees them working together as a team, both Healers at St. Mungo’s, helping people and sneaking glances at each other when they can. Sydney was never good at Divination, but she prays to God that these visions are of the future and not just hopeless dreaming. She never thought she would be so sappy and actually _in love_ , but here she is, lying in bed, lost in fantasies about a girl like some sort of teenage cliché.

Sydney always thought love would feel crushing and twisting (blame the media), but what she feels for Maggie is like a warm breeze. It flows leisurely in and out of her, warming her insides and filling her up. She of course feels the pull on her heart and the racing too, but loving Maggie is so easy it comes almost naturally. She feels drawn to her like Maggie is generating some sort of gravity that Sydney can’t escape, no matter how many times she’s tried. And it’s not a violent pull, either. It’s organic and welcoming and God, Sydney wants her more than anything. 

She remembers how much weight was lifted off her shoulders when Maggie told her she was single. Sydney was so fearful that Maggie was taken; who can resist her? But she was surprised and relieved to hear that she was available. This was the perfect chance for Sydney to give it a shot. She doesn’t know if Maggie was resentful towards her for her indecisiveness during fifth year, but she’s one hundred percent ready this time and she wants to show her in any way she can. She doesn’t expect anything from Maggie, but she hopes that she’ll give her another chance. 

And now she’s finally told her. They had walked back to the Hufflepuff dorms together, and Sydney had finally told her how she felt. All that’s left now is to see what Maggie says. She had told her that she would give her as much time as she needed, but Sydney can barely wait. She knows that there’s _something_ stirring in Maggie (she was never good at hiding her feelings), and she hopes that she feels the same, although maybe not to the degree that Sydney feels). She still feels the thrum of fear in her veins, but still, the positive hopefulness outweighs it. What happens happens, and Sydney’s put it all out there. All she can do is wait for Maggie’s response. 

Sydney falls asleep amidst the slowing bustle of the girls around her. As her breathing calms and she settles into REM sleep, this is what she sees: she and Maggie walk hand in hand in a park. Birds whistle around them and the trees blow lazily in the wind, leaves rustling and some falling gently onto the ground. They both hold red balloons given to them by a friendly passerby in their free hands. Maggie spots something in the distance and runs toward it, pulling Sydney along with her. Her balloon bobs up and down with her pounding steps. Sydney lets go of her balloon in surprise and it floats on happily into the sky. She tightens her grip around Maggie’s hand and they both laugh as they run into the distance.


	16. Chapter 16

Word about Sydney’s return spreads annoyingly quickly. That evening in the Hufflepuff Common Room, a girl-Annie? Alice?-approaches her cautiously and whispers confidentially, “Sydney Katz is back” and rushes away. Maggie is left sitting dumbfounded with her scrolls and quills spread in a mess in front of her. 

Even worse, Alex confronts her that evening as she heads back from a midnight kitchen run. Maggie’s enjoying a cream puff when suddenly she’s rammed into the wall and the bite she’s just taken goes down the wrong pipe. She sputters and spends the next minute coughing and wheezing with her hands on her knees. She glares at Alex when she’s recovered, and her best friend has the tact to look at least slightly sheepish.

“Sorry Mags, but I had to talk to you! Where did you and Sydney go after dinner? Are you okay?” She says all of this as rapidly as she can so she can get Maggie’s answer more quickly.

“Oh, man.” Maggie crosses her arms. “A lot happened. We went for a walk and talked about a bunch of stuff…and she asked me out.” The corner of Maggie’s mouth turns up even if the rest of her face is scrunched in confusion.

Alex’s eyes almost bug out. “WHAT?! She asked you out?!” Maggie gives her a pointed look. They’re in public and it’s past midnight, after all. Alex continues in a whisper. “That’s the first thing she did when she came back? Asked you out?” She nods her head. “She’s got balls, that Katz.”

Maggie rolls her eyes and sighs. “I don’t know what to do! I’ve been up all night thinking about it! Why did she do this now? And what am I supposed to do?”

“That’s easy. Do you still have feelings for her?”

Maggie pauses. “I don’t know. And it’s not easy! What if we get together and she leaves again? What if we don’t get together and it’s awkward since she’s my Potions partner _again_ , not to mention the new Adjunct Instructor in Healing Club! And she could be the make it or break it for my application to St. Mungo’s!”

Alex blinks. “Wow, that’s a lot. I guess you have to think about whether you really want to date her. I mean, you had gotten over her and everything. Is it worth taking that risk?”

Maggie exhales and slumps a little down the wall. “I don’t know. And I’m all confused about my feelings. I really thought I was over her but now that she’s back…I’m all twisted up inside.”

Alex pats her arm. “Oh, Mags.”

* * *

Maggie tosses and turns in bed before giving up on sleep with a huff. She grabs her watch off her nightstand and checks the time. Six in the morning. She gets up with a few grumbles and heads toward the showers. 

Zach is sitting at their usual spot when she arrives for breakfast.

“Zach? What are you doing here?” Maggie asks with surprise.

He lifts his head. “Oh, hey, Mags. I couldn’t sleep last night.”

Maggie groans. “Tell me about it.”

“There _is_ something you need to tell me about,” Zach says with a smirk. “I heard Sydney came back for you.”

“Oh God,” Maggie mutters.

“What happened after we left yesterday?” Zach raises his eyebrows, his smirk never disappearing. “Dawn told me that Sydney was completely lost in thought last night, like a zombie or something.”

“Ugh. She told me she has feelings for me.”

“Finally.” His tone implies _and?_

Maggie rolls her eyes. “Yeah, finally.”

“Aaaand?”

“I don’t know!” Maggie flings her arms up in the air. “I never thought I’d see her again-I’d gotten over her-and now she’s back and telling me these things and…I’m still processing.” Maggie groans again and lays her forehead on the table. 

“Better figure it out,” Zach mutters quickly. He turns his head. “Good morning, Sydney!”

Maggie lifts her head quickly.

“Morning.” Sydney sits next to Maggie and shoots her a quick smile. She pours herself a glass of orange juice and piles a few items on her plate.

Maggie and Zach stare at each other (Zach waggling his eyebrows and Maggie glaring) while Sydney says her prayers. 

Sydney spreads jam onto a bagel. “You two are up early.”

“Yeah…Mags and I are going on a walk before class this morning.”

Sydney raises an eyebrow. “There’s three feet of snow outside and the sun is barely up.”

Maggie places a hand on Sydney’s shoulder, subconsciously noticing Sydney’s quiet intake of breath. “What Zach meant to say is that we were going to go on a walk, but now we’re deciding what to do since the weather sucks.”

Sydney nods and puts down her knife. “I’m going to prepare a Skin Sealer for Healing Club if you two would like to join me.”

Zach scratches the stubble on his cheek. “I might try to sleep again but that sounds like fun, Maggie.” 

She glares at him. “I think I’ll try to sleep too, but I’ll see you in class,” she tells the other girl.

“Sounds good.”

* * *

Maggie roams around the castle after her nap. She climbs up and down ten flights of stairs before deciding to visit the library. She finds Shahir at his usual table, sitting behind a large book. He chews on a quill before scribbling a few notes on a spare piece of parchment.

“Hey, Shahir.” Maggie takes a seat across from him.

“Maggie,” he greets. “I’m surprised you aren’t elsewhere right now.”

Maggie tilts her head. “What do you mean?”

“Sydney’s back.” Shahir’s matter of fact tone makes Maggie groan. She suspects she’s going to be doing a lot of that today.

“If I hear that one more time…” 

He sets down his quill. “You know she’s in-“

“Mags, that’s where you are!” Alex’s loud voice startles them both.

“Alex!”

Alex grabs Maggie’s arm and drags her away from the table. “Sorry, Shahir. I need to steal Maggie from you.”

Shahir nods and returns to his book.

“Alex! What was that for?” Maggie straightens her robes as they walk down a hallway.

“We have to talk!” Alex pulls her into an empty classroom.

“We just talked like six hours ago!” Maggie puts her hands on her hips.

Alex points at her. “I know, but what are you going to do at Healing Club tonight?”

“What do you mean?”

“Sydney’s kind of our boss and with whatever’s going on between you two…what are you going to do?”

Maggie runs a hand through her hair. “I’m going to learn and deal with my personal stuff later, of course!”

“Okay…”

* * *

Maggie, Alex, Charlie, Zach, Dawn, and Shahir walk as a group to Healing Club. Maggie vaguely registers their talking around her, but is mostly stuck in her own head. Sydney has a sort of power relationship over her. What if things go South and she sabotages her application? Not like Sydney’s that type of person but the possibility is frightening. What if they get together and now there’s favoritism? But Sydney told her that she probably wouldn’t have to look at her application anyway. How are they going to deal with the awkward air between them? Sydney’s eagerly anticipating her response and Maggie’s still trying to process how she feels.

“You ready?” Alex grabs her arm before they arrive at the classroom.

Maggie takes a deep breath. “Yup.”

Sydney stands at the front of the classroom next to Instructor Weasley. She’s wearing her light blue Healing Intern robes, while the Instructor is in his customary lime green. The table in front of them holds the Skin Sealer she made earlier that day. Her eyes flicker to Maggie’s group, analyzing everyone who just walked in. They linger on Maggie before she looks away.

“Welcome, everyone,” Instructor Wealsey greets. “We have a very special guest this semester.” He puts a hand on Sydney’s shoulder. “This is Sydney Katz. She just completed an internship at St. Mungo’s and will be a Trainee Healer this Fall. She will join me as an Adjunct Instructor for this semester. You’re all very lucky!”

Sydney has a slight flush on her neck and cheeks and waves awkwardly at the group. “It’s a pleasure to be here.”

Instructor Weasley takes his hand off her shoulder. “Now, we will have two stations today. Sydney will demonstrate how to make a Skin Sealer and I will teach you how to remove pus from open wounds. Slytherins and Hufflepuffs with Sydney, and the rest with me. We’ll switch stations after half an hour.”

There’s some shuffling as the different Houses move to their assigned stations, and jostling as everyone tries to get in front for the best view. Zach manages to maneuver them to the front, even though he towers over most of their peers and Maggie’s taller than the average girl. Sydney pauses for a fraction of a second when she sees them.

She shifts into Instructor mode. “Okay, today I’m showing you how to make a Skin Sealer. These can be made with various ingredients that you may have around, so I’ll show you some variations.” 

Maggie is listening carefully but damn, Sydney’s hot when she’s speaking in her serious teacher voice.

“Who can name a few plants that may be ingredients?”

Zach elbows Maggie in the side. _Oh!_ She startles out of her appreciative thoughts. He raises his hand since it appears Maggie won’t. “I’ve heard about aloe?”

“Yes, aloe can be used, although you want to ensure your patient doesn’t accidentally swallow it because it can also be used as a laxative.”

Maggie breathes in and out and counts to three in her head. She raises her hand.

Sydney blinks. “Yes?”

“Cassava, nagaimo, lignum vitae, and many other starchy and wet plants.”

Sydney nods, impressed. “Precisely. Very good.”

Maggie smiles with pride.

“You must mash these plants to release the chemicals that act as sealants and mix them with certain ingredients. Can anyone name one?”

A Slytherin raises her hand. “Dittany,” she says haughtily. She smirks to her friends.

Sydney narrows her eyes so slightly that Maggie’s unsure whether anyone else can tell. “Not quite the answer I was looking for. Dittany heals flesh, but it shouldn’t be mixed with any other ingredients. More to the point, it’s not a common item.” She looks around the group, expecting someone else to raise their hand.

Maggie frowns. Didn’t Sydney mention something during fifth year when they had their study sessions for O.W.L.S.? 

_Maggie had been laying on a couch in the Hufflepuff Common Room with her notes in her lap. Sydney had pulled another couch up right next to hers so the beds were connected and they were laying next to each other._

_”I’ve been making ‘herbal remedies’ for my parents for when they cut themselves and I’m not there,” Sydney had confided in her with her eyes closed and her breathing slowing. “I just mix some gummy plants and murtlap if it’s available.”_

_“And they have no idea what’s in it?” Maggie had noted the pounding of her heart since she was so close to Sydney._

_“Nope. I put some mint in it so it smells good, too. They just ask for my ‘minty poultice’,” Sydney laughs._

_Maggie had made an “mm” sound since she was almost asleep by that point._

But Maggie remembers that conversation now. “Murtlap!” she exclaims.

Sydney pauses since she also remembers their conversation. “Yes, that’s correct.” Wasn’t that the time Maggie had passed out and rolled half on top of her? And she had just laid there for minutes hoping Maggie’s Housemates wouldn’t pass by and catch her in a somewhat compromising position? But now’s not the time to reminisce. 

“You can also use pomegranate juice, wormwood, scarabs, and thyme.” She lists off the list like it’s nothing and Maggie-well-she’s impressed to say the least. 

Sydney spends the rest of the half hour demonstrating the different combinations they can make and instructs them all to make a new variation by the next meeting. 

“You’re assigning us homework?” The same Slytherin girl from before speaks up. “We’re already studying for N.E.W.T.S.! I guess your internship really made you all high and mighty, huh, Sydney?”

Sydney doesn’t take the bait. “You can try it or not. I don’t really care. It shouldn’t take a competent potion brewer longer than ten minutes,” she replies dismissively.

Maggie bites back a smile despite her anger at the Slytherin who doesn’t respect Sydney.

The other Slytherin huffs and throws her hair back over her shoulder. “What will we be testing these on, anyway?”

Sydney shrugs. “Yourselves. So make sure you do a good job.”

Instructor Weasley yells out “switch!” right after, so the girl has no time but to open her mouth in belligerent surprise. Maggie glances at Sydney before she lets herself be shuffled away and gives her a reassuring smile.

“You sure were sucking up to our girl, Mags,” Zach mutters so no one else can hear.

“She’s _my_ girl! I mean she’s no one’s girl! She’s not _our_ girl!” Maggie exclaims, tripping over her words.

Zach smirks. “Admit it. You like seeing her in charge.”

“No comment.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This will be the last chapter until probably the weekend. I'll be out of town again for business.


	17. Chapter 17

Maggie stays silent during the last five minutes of Healing Club. Instructor Weasley is beginning to wrap up, but she’s only half listening to him. She sees in her mind herself pushing Sydney against a wall and kissing her after everyone lets out. Or even better, Sydney pushing her against a wall. Oh yes, that would be nice (she’s _really hot_ when she’s in charge, okay?). But what does this mean? Sure, she’s attracted to her, but is she actually into her? Is she going to let herself open up these feelings again?

These questions rage like a hurricane through her mind as she heads back to her Common Room, but she can only think in circles. What is she going to do tomorrow at breakfast with these confusing desires running around in her mind and body?

* * *

Sydney thinks she’s been patient. It’s been three days since her confession, three awkward days filled with gaps in conversation and Maggie avoiding her whenever she can. Her heart sinks when she thinks about what this means. Either Maggie is too afraid to reject her, or she can’t make up her mind about what to do. They only have Potions and Healing Club once a week-Mondays and Tuesdays respectively-so she hasn’t seen Maggie outside of meals. She knows not to force the issue, though. Whatever Maggie decides is something Sydney can’t push. She just has to wait it out.

Which is a lot easier said than done. What she wants is finally within her reach, and she just can’t reach out and grab it. She just has to keep her hand stretched out until Maggie crosses from the other side to meet her. 

And while being patient sounds good in theory, Sydney finds herself agitated all the time and her patience is growing thin. What can she do but wait, though? She’s always hated the unknown and she prays to God every night that Maggie will make up her mind soon.

* * *

The fourth morning after Sydney’s confession finds Alex rushing towards Maggie in a frenzy. 

“Maggie!” She grabs Maggie’s arms.

“Whoa, Alex! What’s wrong?” Maggie’s expression shifts to shock.

“Charles escaped! I can’t find him anywhere!” Alex is almost crying. Charles is her bunny Maggie bought her for her birthday second year. He’s a cute little grey ball of fur that everyone, even Shahir, loves. It’s always a joke among the group that she ended up dating a guy named Charlie because she loves Charles so much.

“Oh no!” Maggie claps a hand to her mouth. 

“Can you help me find him? I’ve got an appointment with the Headmaster,” Alex begs.

“Of course! I’ll go look now!”

Alex gives her a thankful and watery smile before she runs off.

Maggie speed walks in the opposite direction with a look of distress. She was able to feign an air of assuredness for Alex but Hogwarts is so damn big she’s going to have to search all day for Charles. She laments the physical labor her legs are going to take today.

He’s not in any of the obvious places, namely the Greenhouses, dungeons, or Great Hall. She hopes that she won’t have to search in the Forbidden Forest because-well-he’d probably be dead.

She huffs in frustration after two hours of peering around corners and crouching to look under desks and chairs. Where could that damn rabbit be? The last thing she wants to do is disappoint Alex. She curses under her breath. Why did she have to get Alex something so mobile for her birthday? She could have gotten a stuffed animal-or pet rock-or anything else!

Maggie runs both hands through her hair and ties it up into a ponytail. She heads up to the Astronomy Tower, although it’s unlikely Charles could have hopped all the way up there. She reaches the top out of breath and has to take a few seconds to recover. There are a few benches and Maggie groans at the thought of having to look under all of them. Better safe than sorry, right? She goes through the first four huffing and puffing and psyches herself up for the next. She gropes under the last one, hoping to touch fur where her eyes can’t see, but no dice. She grumbles as she emerges from under the bench.

“Maggie?”

Maggie freezes. _Shit_. She shakily stands up.

“Hey, Syd.”

Sydney doesn’t look angry, but she’s not happy, either. “What are you doing?”

“I’m looking for Charles,” Maggie replies as she wipes her hands off on her robes.

“Alex’s rabbit?” Sydney crosses her arms.

“Yup.”

“Is that why you’ve been avoiding me recently?” Sydney’s defiant as she hides her apprehension.

Maggie bites her lip. “No, he just went missing today.”

Sydney nods and turns away in frustration. 

“Syd!” Maggie yells out in desperation. 

The other girl closes her eyes and sighs. She can’t refuse Maggie anything. “What?” It comes out colder than she intended.

Maggie pauses for a second. “Will you help me look for him? I’ve tried everywhere and he just won’t turn up! You don’t owe me anything, but-“

Sydney sighs again. “Fine. I’ll help out. Where have you looked already?”

And that’s something Maggie loves about her. Likes. Likes about her. Sydney’s almost always ready to drop what she’s doing to help her out.

* * *

Another hour passes and Maggie hasn’t seen even a single grey hair off Charles’ pelt. She’s sweaty and frustrated and wants to yell or cry but she knows neither will help. She heads to the Great Hall for a quick lunch and catches Sydney on the way in.

She has a couple of hairs out of place and is also sweaty, but she still looks so beautiful. Maggie stops in her tracks. She looks put together. As in she can look maintained even when she’s stressed. She mentally slaps herself. _Get it together!_

“I haven’t seen him yet, but there are still lots of places to look,” Sydney says seriously.

“Like where? The bathrooms?” Maggie throws her arms in the air and lets the sarcasm come out due to her exasperation.

“Have a little faith in me, I’ll find him!” Sydney is defiant (as always) and tilts her chin up. 

They scarf down their food while discussing further places to look.

An arguing couple sits right next to them. Sydney makes eye contact with Maggie as the other two sit.

“You should have told me!” The guy contests.

“It didn’t affect you! We weren’t even having sex at that point!” The girl replies.

Maggie raises her eyebrows and Sydney mirrors her.

“That doesn’t matter! We were together!” The guy bolts up and leaves, leaving the girl to cry right next to Maggie.

She shoots a pleading look at Sydney, who motions with her head for them to leave.

“Wow, I can’t believe she would hide a thing like that,” Sydney brings up. She shakes her head slowly.

“I don’t know, there have to be secrets in a relationship.” Maggie looks up at the ceiling.

Sydney turns to look at her. “I disagree. Relationships should be built on honestly.”

“Sometimes you have to hide things to make them go more smoothly!”

Sydney looks at her critically. “Even lying? Lying by omission is still lying.”

“I guess you’re right…but I’ve never really done something like that. I just think that both partners have to keep some secrets,” Maggie mumbles at the end.

“Hmm.”

They depart after that without much more than a “good luck”.

Maggie manages to discover a tuft of fur on the steps that lead outside after another hour. _Oh no_. She finds Sydney ten minutes later and tells her about it.

“Oy vey. Why can’t we just get her a new rabbit?” Sydney rubs a hand across her forehead.

Maggie puts her hands on her hips and shoots Sydney a serious stare. “No! We’re not getting a replacement bunny! We have to find Charles!” 

“Okay, okay. There are still a couple of places we haven’t checked. You stay inside and I’ll look outside.” Sydney grabs Maggie’s shoulders. “We can do this, Maggie!”

Sydney leaves immediately, but Maggie stands there for a few more seconds, still feeling Sydney’s touch.

* * *

Her elation becomes exhaustion by the end of the day. She still hasn’t found Charles and if there’s no sign of him at this point, he’s probably lost forever. 

She finds Alex emerging from the Gryffindor portrait hole before dinner. 

“Did you find him?” Alex looks hopeful.

Maggie hangs her head. “No, I-“

“I’ve got him right here.” Sydney’s voice comes from behind her. Maggie gasps and turns around. Sydney has a few leaves in her hair-and is that a twig? But she’s holding Charles in her hands.

Alex bursts into tears as she reaches for him. “Thank you so much, Syd!” She throws an arm around Sydney and pulls her into a long hug. Sydney looks shocked for a moment and slowly brings her arms around Alex to hug her back. 

Alex withdraws. “I’m going to put him up.” She looks at the two of them. “You two are a Godsend.” And with that she returns back to her Common Room.

Maggie turns to Sydney. “Where did you find him?”

Sydney pulls a leaf out of her hair. “The Greenhouses. I know you said you checked, but I had to double check. He sure was hidden in there.”

They both divert their gazes as the couple from earlier passes by. They’re holding hands and laughing as they walk through the corridor. 

Maggie pauses. If they could make up after the fight they had, surely she can do something with Sydney. “Uh-will you show me?”

Sydney smiles. “Of course.”

And everything feels different now. Maggie feels like she’s standing on the precipice of something great. Her heart feels like it’s going to jump out of her chest and she-well-she really wants to kiss Sydney. And not just that. She wants more. She wants to see what other things she and Sydney can do together. What adventures they may have, what other stories they’ll be able to tell together. It all comes together in that moment. The path becomes illuminated and she knows what she has to do.

* * *

Sydney opens the door to the greenhouse and waves Maggie in.

“Still a gentlewoman, I see,” Maggie comments. 

Sydney smirks at her. “I didn’t change _that_ much.”

She leads Maggie to the back of the greenhouse where ten pots or so are shoved together. The leaves from the plants are all entangled and there’s barely any space to see anything.

“Here’s where I found him. He was happily chewing on these leaves.” Sydney smiles fondly at the ground as she reimagines Charles’ nibbling.

“I see.” Maggie’s voice sounds distant, as if she’s contemplating something deeply.

Sydney looks back up, and Maggie’s looking at her in some way she can’t understand.

“Maggie?”

She sees a flash of something in Maggie’s eyes before the other girl takes a few quick steps forward and presses her lips against her own. Sydney grunts in surprise, but Maggie’s hands are cupping her cheeks, and her lips are so soft and insistent that she forgets that she’s been irritated and anxious for the past four days. She lets herself melt into the kiss and pulls Maggie closer by the waist-but wait! She draws back, even as Maggie tries to chase her withdrawing lips. 

Maggie looks at her questioningly before she turns red. “Oh, sorry. We need to have that talk.”

Sydney nods quickly. “Yes, we do.” She scratches her arm even though it doesn’t itch. “Is this your answer?”

Maggie tucks a stray hair behind her ear and chuckles nervously. “I guess so. I haven’t been trying to hurt you, Syd. I was just processing.”

Sydney stays silent.

“Ever since I met you I wondered what it would like to be with you. But there was so much going on back then and we just weren’t ready. Now that you’re back…” Maggie takes a deep breath. “You were so sure of yourself and that scared me a little.”

Sydney’s eyes soften and her lips turn up in a soft smile.

“I had never seen you so confident and I was scared of the expectations.” Maggie glances at the ground and nervously back at Sydney.

“Maggie, I never had any expectations. Even with our differences back then, and even now, all I want is you.”

Maggie nods and smiles. “And all I want is you.”

Sydney smiles back and her heart soars. This is worth it. Two and a half years of off and on whatever they had, friendship, tears, and heartbreak, it’s all worth it. Because she’s kissing Maggie again, and Maggie’s hands are in her hair and then running up and down her back, and her own are touching Maggie’s body. She swipes her tongue across Maggie’s lower lip which makes Maggie moans into her mouth, and Sydney smiles into their kiss.

They spend what feels like hours once again kissing in the greenhouse, but this time Maggie’s hers. There’s no boyfriend, or hesitation, or anything that will hold them back this time. They end up holding each other tightly, swaying slightly on the spot. Sydney’s face is buried in Maggie’s shoulder and her scent and warmth surround her. It’s all worth it. They’re finally ready to move forward together, and it’s perfect. 

Maggie’s stomach growls loudly and Sydney swears she can feel the vibrations through both their cloaks. They laugh as they separate.

“I completely forgot about dinner! I’m starving!” Maggie exclaims as she pats her stomach. She holds her hand out. “Would you like to join me?” She feels how swollen her lips are from kissing as she smirks.

Sydney huffs out a laugh as she takes Maggie’s hand.

“Yeah, let’s go.” 

“You totally distracted me, Syd.” She swings their arms. 

“Better get used to it.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There's probably just one chapter left since I'm completely out of ideas. Thank you to everyone who has left comments and kudos, and the rest who have enjoyed this series. I had a lot of fun writing it!


	18. Chapter 18

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As you may have guessed, I have just returned from yet another business trip, but here's the last installment! This is the song that inspired this entire work. It talks about how two people are meant to be, even if they are apart for a little bit of time. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-LTP5zm8KFQ.

Zach likes to think of himself as considerate of other people. He knows when to give people space, and he even pretends to sleep when his dormmates aren’t so quiet with their nighttime activities. Everyone has needs, right? And speaking of needs…he has the worst luck.

He’s glad Maggie and Sydney have finally gotten together, but he keeps stumbling upon them in the most awkward situations. Zach knows they’re trying to keep their relationship on the DL because the whole school knows about their past drama, but are they really trying considering the number of times he’s caught them?

He first catches them in a broom closet the day after he figures out they’re an item (it wasn’t hard to tell with all the heart eyes they’ve been shooting each other). He needs a place to hide a Fanged Frisbee from an extremely strict ex-Prefect (why won’t she cut him some slack considering he’s her girlfriend’s second best friend?), so he ducks into the broom closet on the fourth floor. It’s not a very popular one, so he figures he’ll be able to retrieve the toy later without hassle. 

His pride at his ingenuity turns into horror as he opens the door to the closet. The first thing he sees is a hand fisted in red hair. Red hair that looks very familiar…someone gasps as the two girls pull apart.

“Zach!” Maggie is breathless as she tucks her shirt back in. Sydney half hides behind her, completely shirtless, but thankfully with her bra still on, staring intently at a different wall. The incredible shade of red her ears, face, neck, and chest are turning belie her intense look.

“Uh…have a nice one, ladies,” is all he can say before he dashes away, Frisbee still in his hand.

Maggie accosts him in Charms three hours later. They’re performing Silencing Charms on bullfrogs that day, and the loud sound of ribbits fills the classroom.

“Zach, you absolutely can’t tell anyone about what you saw earlier,” Maggie pleads. “Syd and I just got together, and she’s not ready for anyone to know-“

Zach grips both her shoulders with a reassuring smile. “Don’t worry, Mags, I’ll keep your secret.”

Maggie exhales in relief. “You’re the best.”

“I know.”

* * *

But again, for a couple that desires privacy, they don’t do a very good job of hiding.

Zach laughs as he pulls Dawn’s hand, leading her toward the closed bathrooms on the second floor. He kisses her on the cheek before he opens the door.

The sounds of breathy moans and quiet giggles reach them nanoseconds before they see the sight before them.

Maggie has Sydney on top of a sink and is kissing down her chest, her girlfriend’s shirt unbuttoned halfway. There is a blooming hickey on Sydney’s neck and her hands are rubbing up and down Maggie’s back.

“Oh, shit,” Zach mutters as quietly as possible, gesturing silently to Dawn to make a speedy escape.

They head instead to his room. At least he knows Maggie and Sydney won’t be _there_.

But Zach’s streak of bad luck doesn’t end there.

He’s browsing the shelves in the library looking for _Sub-Aquatic Botanical Mysteries_ when he stumbles upon them again. It’s been a week since he caught them in the bathroom, and thank goodness they didn’t seem him and Dawn. Sydney would have probably died on the spot.

But anyway, he’s fingering the books on the shelves, reading the titles, and making his way leftward when he sees movement through the space between the top of the books and the next shelf upward.

Sydney’s gripping Maggie’s hips as they kiss like it’s their last time or something. _In a library of all places?! Maybe that’s what gets a nerd like Sydney off?_

Maggie lets out a moan as Sydney kisses her way up her jaw and bites her ear.

“Quiet, baby,” Sydney whispers as she hovers her lips again over Maggie’s own.

They connect again and Zach walks away as quickly as he can while maintaining complete silence, his cheeks red. 

Zach’s used to tiptoeing around those two after a month of catching them in all sorts of situations. He doesn’t know when it’ll happen again, and he hopes it’s not soon. He’s had to see a red-faced Maggie and frazzled Sydney too many times.

He yawns and scratches his stomach as he makes his way down the stairs toward the common area of the Slytherin dorm. It’s one in the morning, and he’s craving a little snack. A trip to the kitchens sounds like the perfect plan. Maybe some cake, or anything covered in chocolate. Yum. He narrows his eyes in the dim lighting; the fire in the fireplace is low, so he can’t see much.

His ears perk up as he hears something…something very uncomfortably familiar to him at this point. He turns the corner and lo and behold, Sydney’s on top of Maggie on the couch closest to the fireplace. There are a few textbooks and other dark things scattered across the floor that look like they were haphazardly dropped down from the couch.

Sydney’s got her hands running down Maggie’s bare sides and a leg pressed in between her thighs. _Oh, shit_. Zach’s eyes widen and he flexes his quads in an attempt to-how can he put it-stay calm. Maggie’s doing her moaning thing that’s mostly silenced by Sydney’s mouth on top of hers-and is she gyrating on Sydney’s leg? Zach looks down at the textbooks again, and that’s when he recognizes the other items on the ground. There’s Sydney’s green tie and Maggie’s yellow one, and there’s Maggie’s shirt as well. 

Zach decides he can wait to eat until breakfast.

* * *

“You and Sydney have to be more discrete,” he orders Maggie the next day. They’re walking toward the Quidditch pitch, ready to catch the Ravenclaw vs. Hufflepuff game. 

“What do you mean?” Maggie’s face scrunches up as she plays with her scarf.

“All of your-activities-in public. If you want to keep your relationship a secret, you have to quit making out where you can be caught so easily!”

Maggie’s indignant. “That was only once!”

“Oh no, it wasn’t. I’ve seen you in the bathroom, library, and Common Room for Christ’s sake!” He enjoys how Maggie flushes redder and redder despite the winter chill as he lists the locations.

She stops in her tracks. “Oh no,” she mutters under her breath. “Syd’s not going to like hearing that.”

“You’re going to have to keep it in your pants a little better. And just some helpful advice-having sex _in the Common Room_ isn’t the best idea.” Zach says all this as matter-of-fact as he can.

“Sex?!” Maggie gapes at him. “We haven’t had sex yet! Especially not in public! I’m going to make that as romantic as possible!” Maggie’s face has reached a truly impressive shade of red that provides quite a contrast compared to the blue sky.

“Wow, the way you two go at it, I figured you already had.” Zach’s surprise shows on his face.

“Ugh, let’s just stop it there. We’ll be more careful.” Maggie shakes her head and they climb the steps up the Hufflepuff stands.

An idea hits Zach.

“Hold up, does it get Sydney excited?”

Maggie swivels her head around. “What?”

“To do stuff in public. I half-realized it in the library.”

Maggie ponders this for a second. “That would make a lot of sense.” A strange smile pulls the left side of her mouth upward. “Damn, my girlfriend must be kinky!”

“Oh gross, let’s stop now.” Zach stuffs his hands in his pockets.

Maggie hums, thinking of new places they can make out where no one will catch them. She’s heard there’s a room on the seventh floor…

* * *

“What are you thinking about?”

Maggie’s laying sideways on Sydney’s stomach and has her eyes closed while her girlfriend plays with her fingers. It’s just before dinnertime so there aren’t many girls left in the Hufflepuff dorm.

“Oh, nothing. Everything.”

Sydney chuckles and kisses her palm. “And I thought I was supposed to be the thinker.”

Maggie shifts upward to bury her head in the crook of Sydney’s arm and throws her own around her waist. “I never thought we’d actually be here, you know? Like actually together.”

“It was all I could think about since we met,” Sydney murmurs.

Maggie’s heart speeds up. She pushes herself further up until her head is even with Sydney’s. She brushes Sydney’s bangs to the side. “How long have you been in love with me?”

Sydney gives her a bashful smile and ducks her head. She reaches out a finger to trace Maggie’s cheek and looks back up again, her eyes meeting Maggie’s. “I don’t know, but I never stopped loving you.”

Maggie quirks her mouth to the side with a smile. “I love you too, you know,” she whispers.

Sydney chuckles and kisses her forehead, then pulls her into a tighter embrace.

And Maggie thinks about the two and a half years they’ve known each other. Sydney always seemed ahead of her, intellectually, with achievements, and she was so sure of herself in most ways that Maggie felt like she was always playing catch up. But now they finally have their timing right. They’ve suffered through heartbreak on both sides, but also great joy as friends, and now who knows what the future will bring them as a couple. But beyond the divides they’ve gone through, no matter how hard they tried to get over each other, they’ve always been connected by a tether that never seemed to break. Really, Maggie thinks, their love, everything they have together, it must be some kind of magic.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so very much to all of you who have followed this story to the end. I have greatly appreciated your feedback and comments, and truly cannot express my gratefulness to each and every one of you. I'm sad to say this will probably the last thing I will write for this couple, unless I can get the energy to write a chapter for my last idea. I hope you all have a wonderful weekend and thanks once again!

**Author's Note:**

> Maggie's in Hufflepuff, Sydney and Zach are in Slytherin, Alex is in Gryffindor, and Herschel is in Ravenclaw.


End file.
